Some people say that the main way to be happy in life is to have a lot of money. How might having a lot of money make people happy ? What other things in life can make people happy ?

#people #life #money

A few individuals say the main path to be cheerful in

life

is to have plenty of funds.

This

essay states that having a lot of money can improve

people

lifestyle, and

entertainment

can make them happy. Enough money makes

people

delighted because it improves their way of

life

That is

to say that they do not have to worry about necessities

such

as food, clothing, shelter but

also

reduces financial burdens

such

as loans and mortgages.

Moreover

, it

also

gives them the chance to fulfil their dreams by purchasing luxurious things which they have only dreamed of.

For example

, The University of New Zealand recently stated that

people

who have more cash are twice happier than other

people

because they can satisfy their dreams by purchasing material possession. Apart from money,

entertainment

such

as watching television can make

people

happy.

In other words

people

prefer movies and music because it not only brings happiness and joy to

life

but

also

reduces stress.

Furthermore

, working individuals hardly get spare time for their family members because of their employment and,

as a result

entertainment

gives them a chance to spend quality time with their parents and loved ones.

For instance

, due to a lack of funds to socialise, many

people

in India prefer watching television as a source of

entertainment

because it makes them cheerful. In conclusion, having sufficient cash makes human beings cheerful because it improves their way of

life

, and apart from funds, and

entertainment

plays a significant role in making an individual's

life

happy.

Submitted by IELTS on Wed Mar 03 2021

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Use a variety of complex and simple sentences

You should use complex sentences in your writing, but it does not mean that you should try to make all of our sentences complex.

‘Complex’ sentences are not actually very complex; they are just two or more simple sentences put together. Putting them together makes the essay more coherent and cohesive.

Examples:

I really want to study but I’m too tired.

I wore a warm coat because the weather was cold.

If action is not taken soon on climate change, global warming will get worse.

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10Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
3Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
0Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

256 words

7.50

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 8.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 6.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 9.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Topic Vocabulary:

Financial security
Basic needs
Comfort
Luxury
Freedom
Altruistic
Philanthropy
Nurturing relationships
Fulfillment
Sense of accomplishment
Physical well-being
Spiritual beliefs
Community involvement
Gratitude
Mindfulness
Simple pleasures

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Some people say that the main way to be happy in life is to have a lot of money. How might having a lot of money make people happy ? What other things in life can make people happy ?

Use a variety of complex and simple sentences

Some museums these days charge an admission fee while others do not. Does the practice of asking an admission fee outweigh any disadvantages? Discuss, including exampled from your own knowledge and experience.

Some people think that foreign visitors should be charged more than locals when they visit cultural and tourist attractions in a country. To what extent do you agree with this view?

In some countries, criminal trials are shown on television for the public. Do the advantages of this outweigh the disadvantages?

The chart below shows the results of a survey about people’s coffee and tea buying and drinking habits in five Australian cities. Summarize the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant. TEST 1