In recent years, many small local shops have closed because customers travel to large shopping centres or mall to do their shopping. Is this a positive or negative development?

#years #shops #customers #travel #centres #mall #development

All over the world ,

this

is a very crucial time for small businesses. In the

last

decade,there are plenty of small shops

shut

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that shut

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down because of online shopping or big malls.I concern that

this

is a negative development for a society which rises a hurdle for local stores. Due to modernization, every individual wants to go

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show examples

a huge mall

center

Change the spelling

centre

show examples

for shopping or for entertainment.

Therefore

, local outlets are surviving to increase or retain their daily sale. Some of

them

Correct your spelling

the

show examples

shit down their companies because of

this

development. On the other side , these big shopping

centers

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centres

show examples

are very modern and people found everything under

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apply

show examples

one roof .

A new

Correct the article-noun agreement

New

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buildings are designs to look attractive and which helps to increase customers.

A another

Remove the article

Another

show examples

adverse result of

this

growth is surging

Remove the article

apply

show examples

unemployment among local workers.

A uneducated

Correct the article-noun agreement

Uneducated

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workers who were working in

these small store

Change the determiner

this small store

these small stores

show examples

are not habitual to do jobs in big malls because they have to educate for getting jobs in large outlets.

Consequently

, they lost their jobs and very hardly they survive in

this

modernization. In a conclusion, I assert that

Remove the comma

apply

show examples

some big organizations or investors

gives

Change the verb form

give

show examples

Remove the article

apply

show examples

huge trouble to small businesses.

This

development is helpful for few cooperations but it gives a hard time

local

Change preposition

to local

show examples

community workers.

Submitted by hardeeppandher6 on Sat Mar 06 2021

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Sentence 1 - Background statement
Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
Sentence 3 - Thesis
Sentence 4 - Outline sentence

Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 4 - Conclusion

Sentence 1 - Summary
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4Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
0Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
15Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

219 words

<4

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 4.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 4.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Topic Vocabulary:

economic downturn
local artisans
monopolization
cultural homogenization
sustainability
carbon footprint
e-commerce
proximity shopping
urban sprawl
retail ecosystem

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In recent years, many small local shops have closed because customers travel to large shopping centres or mall to do their shopping. Is this a positive or negative development?

Fully explain your ideas

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

Many people now undertake extreme activities, from hang-gliding to mountain climbing. Why do people risk their lives in this way, and do you think this is a good trend?

As most people spend a major part of their adult life at work, job satisfaction is an important element of individual wellbeing. What factors contribute to job satisfaction? How realistic is the expectation of job satisfaction for all workers?

The most important aim of science should be to improve people’s lives. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement?

Some people believe that children should be required to do community service in their free time. To what extent do you agree or disagree?