IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 2.5

Some people think that best way to reduce crime is to give longer prison sentences. Others , however, believe there are better alternative ways of reducing crime. Discuss both view and give your opinion.

#people #crime #prison #sentences #alternative
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There is one thing
which
Correct pronoun usage
that
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 can
seen
Change the verb form
be seen
see
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 everywhere,
crime
Use synonyms
 - it may be
low intensity
Add a hyphen
low-intensity
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crime
Use synonyms
 or Heinous
crime
Use synonyms
. Some proportion of masses opine that best way to handle
this
Linking Words
 is to send
criminals
Use synonyms
 in prison for
long
Change the article
a long
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 time
, ;
Change the punctuation
,
;
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 others opine that other alternative ways decline
crime
Use synonyms
 more efficiently. Watch the arguments
need
Correct pronoun usage
that need
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 scrutiny before forming an opinion. Long prison sentences are the best way to teach offenders.
Firstly
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,
those
Change preposition
for those
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 who are thinking about committing crimes,
this
Linking Words
Change the adverb
good
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well
Correct your spelling
will
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 act as
lesson
Add an article
a lesson
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 for them.
For example
Linking Words
, sending home Fernandez in
the
Correct article usage
apply
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jail for
long
Add an article
a long
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 period for small crimes than others think twice before committing any
crime
Use synonyms
. Apart from
this
Linking Words
, if
criminals
Use synonyms
 are sending to
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
jail for
long
Change the article
a long
show examples
 time, there
are
Change the verb form
is
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better
Correct article usage
a better
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 opportunity to re-educate them.
However
Linking Words
,
crime
Use synonyms
 should be eliminated from
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
society
not
Add the comma(s)
,not
show examples
 the
criminals
Use synonyms
.
First
Linking Words
 of all the character of criminal will not improve,
because
Add the preposition
ofbecause
show examples
 the mix with other
criminals
Use synonyms
.
Therefore
Linking Words
 rather than sending them for longer sentences, the focus should be on developing good alternatives.
Hence
Linking Words
, it may improve their character. In my opinion, it is important to focus on alternative methods but it should be restricted to hardcore
criminals
Use synonyms
 and heinous crimes. In conclusion, there are arguments not only in
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
favour
for
Change preposition
of
show examples
 long prison sentences but
also
Linking Words
in
Change preposition
apply
show examples
against the same .
Submitted by naresh on

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To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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