IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 6.5

Some organisations believe that their employees should dress smartly. Others value quality of work above appearance. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

#organisations #employees #dress #value #quality #work #appearance
Appearance
 is important in the firms, the majority think that the workers suppose to
dress
 smartly.
However
, I think the results of the
work
 is more necessary for the workforce
instead
 of the quality of their
dress
. I will discuss
this
 opinion in
this
 article.
Firstly
, dressing smartly may make some specialists spend more
time
 on clothes during the
work
 rather than focusing on the contents of
work
,
this
 may waste their
time
 to create less valuable products.
For example
, computer science students have a more logical mind comparing with art students. Specifically, they usually prefer to wear suitable clothes like T-shirts
instead
 of wearing suits in daily life.
Also
, they usually sit in front of computers to solve the programme apps or software problems and barely talk with other co-workers because they need to concentrate on their code. As the result, dressing up will occupy their
time
 somewhat, to lead that they would spend less
time
 on the professional area, due to they have to think about their
appearance
 for the
work
.
Secondly
, valuing the quality of
work
 is definitely more vital than the
dress
 requirements and it contains different skills and knowledge. Specifically, good
work
 results involve multiple aspects to measure the qualities ,not just
appearance
.
For instance
, communication is one of the useful aspects for the employees, they may need to cooperate with other people to
work
 together,
also
, the good qualities of
work
 could bring the better efforts of income, which is the key to make the company could survive and grow in the cruel markets. To conclude, good
appearance
 definitely would enhance employees or workforce's mood in
work
,
however
, there are many other perspectives could affect the
work
 value,
as a result
, the firms suppose to consider more in order to survive and expend better in
this
 competing market by results
instead
 of the
dress
.
Submitted by oceanplus on

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Use a variety of complex and simple sentences

You should use complex sentences in your writing, but it does not mean that you should try to make all of our sentences complex.

‘Complex’ sentences are not actually very complex; they are just two or more simple sentences put together. Putting them together makes the essay more coherent and cohesive.

Examples:

I really want to study but I’m too tired.

I wore a warm coat because the weather was cold.

If action is not taken soon on climate change, global warming will get worse.

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