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Writing Samples
Band 5.5

In multicultural societies, people of different cultural backgrounds live and work together. Do you think the advantages of multicultural societies outweigh the disadvantages?

#societies #people #backgrounds #work
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Due to the effects of globalisation
people
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 have started to immigrate more often. It has been adversely affecting national homogeneity in all countries and bringing new challenges for governments and
people
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 in general. On the one
hand
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 the benefit of multiethnic societies is that they complement each other bringing national diversity to the country. If you live in a multinational country, you learn to be more tolerant
to
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of
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 other cultures. It leads to building more open-mind societies which are based on respect and preserving different cultural identities.
In other
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words
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 it gives a possibility to create a safe place to live for many
people
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 where they can develop their talents enriching society in a multicultural way. But
on the other
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hand
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 sometimes
people
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 can not assimilate in multicultural societies. There are many reasons for it.
For example
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, if
people
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 do not know the local language, it is more difficult for them to become a part of the community and expand their view
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 the world. It might give rise to prejudice because we as human beings treat everything unknown with care and it splits the society according to language. And we took only the language aspect so far, but there are many other differences like nation, religion and colour of skin. All those features could be a reason for discrimination and separation. As we know from history, disunited countries have higher levels of internal aggression and are weaker in comparison to the united ones. In conclusion, I want to admit that I am in two minds regarding
this
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 question because I truly believe that it is a challenge for a society to find a way where they can guarantee their citizens more benefits than disadvantages through multicultural experience.
Submitted by ekaterina.kosheleva.2016 on

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Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • Cultural diversity
  • Social cohesion
  • Economic prosperity
  • Integration
  • Cultural identity
  • Heritage preservation
  • Language barriers
  • Global talent
  • Innovation
  • Inclusion
  • Tolerance
  • Intercultural understanding
What to do next:
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