Some people say that advertising is extremely successful at persuading us to buy things. Others think that advertising is so common that we no longer pay attention to it. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

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Some people think that advertising is successful in capturing consumers'
attention
,
while
others believe that advertising is too common to be noticed.
This
essay will analyze both viewpoints and argue that excessive
advertisements
can result in
attention
-related issues. On the one hand, it is true that advertising can have more chances to grasp people's
attention
because
advertisements
are generally designed by some technical measures.
For example
, complemented colours are a common measure. Designers may use red and green colours to create colour contrasts, appealing to consumers’ eyes, and thereby stimulating their brains. With
this
stimulation, people will pay more
attention
to these messages and have a higher probability to purchase the products, which are advertised.
Therefore
,
advertisements
are successful in persuading individuals to purchase.
On the other hand
, the opponents may argue that overabundant advertising will lead to them losing concentration. Undoubtedly, current society is filled with a considerable amount of
information
, particularly in the technological aspect.
Although
having numerous cutting-edge devices
such
as smartphones, artificial intelligence systems, and virtual reality glasses is a positive phenomenon to facilitate the development of convenience, excessive
information
might cause obstacles to choose from, ultimately resulting in losing their
attention
to purchasing these products. From my personal experience, moderate advertising may provide a balance to customers
This
measure not only represents adequate
information
to make decisions but
also
may not cause eye fatigue-related problems.
To sum up
, utilizing some methods of advertising
such
as colour complementary can indeed increase the chances of purchasing.
However
, overabundant
information
may lead to eye fatigue and loss of concentration.
As a result
, establishing moderate environments to publish
advertisements
may be a reasonable measure to prevent losing
attention
.
Submitted by daniellin0717 on

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task achievement
Your essay provides a balanced discussion on both viewpoints and offers a clear personal opinion, which is great. However, there are some areas where you can improve. For instance, try to include more specific examples to support your points. For example, mentioning a specific advertisement that uses complementary colors effectively would strengthen your argument.
coherence cohesion
Your essay is generally well-structured, with a clear introduction, body paragraphs, and a conclusion. However, some sentences could be more coherent. For instance, the sentence 'With this stimulation, people will pay more attention to these messages and have a higher probability to purchase the products, which are advertised' could be clearer if rephrased. Consider using more varied sentence structures to improve readability.
task achievement
You did a good job of addressing both perspectives and providing a balanced analysis. This shows that you have a good understanding of the topic.
coherence cohesion
Your introduction and conclusion are well-constructed. You effectively set up the discussion in the introduction and summarize your points in the conclusion, which helps to create a cohesive essay.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • persuade
  • promote
  • attract
  • influence
  • impact
  • consumerism
  • commercialism
  • market
  • product
  • brand
  • endorsement
  • manipulative
  • saturated
  • overwhelmed
  • repetitive
  • distracting
  • irrelevant
  • exaggerated
  • misleading
  • desensitized
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