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Band 5.5

Nowadays, obesity is increasing in a rapid pace. The reasons of it and how to tackle this issue

#obesity #pace
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IN
THIS
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 DAY
AN
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AND
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 AGE, THERE IS AN EVER-INCREASING NUMBER OF OBESE
PEOPLE
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. IN
THIS
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 ESSAY, I WILL EXPLAIN WHY THERE ARE MORE OVERWEIGHT
PEOPLE
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 BASED ON
PEOPLE
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'S
HEALTH
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 HABITS AND
PEOPLE
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'S WORK.
ALSO
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, WILL SUGGEST TWO
MEAUSURES
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MEASURES
 TO ADDRESS
THIS
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 MATTER.
TO BEGIN
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 WITH, THERE ARE TWO MAIN REASONS WHY OBESITY HAS INCREASED .
FIRSTLY
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,
PEOPLE
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 TEND TO EAT MORE JUNK
FOOD
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 THESE DAYS GIVEN THAT THEY HAVE MANY
RESPONSIBLITIES
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RESPONSIBILITIES
 TO COVER BOTH PERSONAL AND PROFESSIONAL SIDE.
PEOPLE
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,
FOR INSTANCE
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, DO NOT HAVE ENOUGH TIME TO COOK
HEALTH
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FOOD
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 (CONTAINING PROTEINS AND MINERALS) SINCE THEY ARE TOO INVOLVED IN MANY ACTIVITIES AT THE SAME TIME
SUCH
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 AS RAISING THEIR CHILDREN AND WORKING .SO PARENTS USE TO PREPARING FATTY
FOOD
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REGARLESS
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REGARDLESS
 OF WHETHER IT IS BENEFICIAL FOR THEIR
HEALTH
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 OR NOT.
SECONDLY
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, THE NUMBER OF TECHNOLOGY-ORIENTED
PEOPLE
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 HAVE INCREASED THANKS TO
BREAKTROUGH
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BREAKTHROUGH
 OF TECHNOLOGICAL ADVANCES.
THEREFORE
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, MORE
PEOPLE
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 SPEND MANY HOURS SITTING IN FRONT OF THE COMPUTERS
WHITOUT
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WITHOUT
 DOING EXERCISES, WHICH IS DETRIMENTAL TO
PEOPLE
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'S
HEALTH
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 . THERE ARE SOME SOLUTIONS IN ORDER TO TACKLE
THIS
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 PROBLEM. ONE SUGGESTION IS THAT PARENTS MIGHT AS WELL PAY ATTENTION TO THEIR
FOOD
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 HABITS AND TRY TO CHANGE THEM FOR THE SAKE OF THEIR CHILDREN AND SO AST TO AVOID
HEALTH
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 DISORDERS.
FURTHERMORE
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, I RECOMMEND FOR THE GOVERNMENT TO PROPEL
HEALTH
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CAMPAINS
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CAMPAIGNS
 ON MASS MEDIA FORWARD SOCIETY WILL RAISE AWARENESS ABOUT THE CONSEQUENCES OF HAVING A SEDENTARY LIFE AND NOT EATING HEALTHY.
THEREFORE
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, THE MORE
PEOPLE
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 KNOW ABOUT OBESITY, THE FEWER
PEOPLE
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 WILL SUFFER FROM IT AND OTHER
HEALTH
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 CONDITION. TO SUM UP, THERE IS MORE THAN MEET THE EYE WHEN IT COMES TO OBESITY, NOWADAYS, SOME
PEOPLE
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 BECOME ILL DUE TO THE LACK OF BALANCE ON THEIR
FOOD
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 AS WELL AS THE KIND OF JOB THAT THEY PERFORM.
THIS
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 PROBLEM COULD BE REDUCED BY DEPLOYING AWARENESS LAWS AND REFLECTING ON THE QUALITY OF
FOOD
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 THAT WE EAT AND THEIR CONSEQUENCES.
Submitted by jakieflorest on

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Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

  • for example
  • for instance
  • to illustrate this
  • to give a clear example
  • such as
  • namely
  • to illustrate
  • take, for example

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