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Band 3.5

In some cities, there is less control over the design and construction of new homes and office buildings. People can build in whatever style they like. Do you think the advantages outweigh the disadvantages?

#cities #control #design #construction #homes #office #buildings #people #style
Recentely
Correct your spelling
Recently
,more and more buildings are constructed by residents themselves in some urban area,due to the less limited with house design and construction.
However
,whether
citizens
 could build a house which is followed their own conceptions has caused a heated debate.In my opinion,I think that will cause
much
Add an article
a much
show examples
 more negative effect than
postive
Correct your spelling
positive
.
Firstly
,architectures which built by non-professionals might have a numerous of potential safety hazard that will make
citizens
 more dangerous in some emergency situation,
such
like
Verify preposition usage
as
show examples
 fire and flood,earthquake,etc.Because architecture is not
simple
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a simple
show examples
 skill like cooking
,
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apply
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before architects got the construct qualification they need
spend
Fix the infinitive
to spend
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 at least five years and attend many
pratical
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practical
 projects
,
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apply
show examples
so that they could
garanteen
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guarantee
guaranteed
 the safety of the buildings.
Accordingly
，
this
 is one of the paramount negative
factor
Change to a plural noun
factors
show examples
.
Secondly
,a diversity and
irrelevent
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irrelevant
relevant
 building style creat by local habitat can not benefit city construction.The outcome would be extremely strange and clumsiness,if every
citizens
Change to a singular noun
citizen
show examples
 build their home in
different
Add an article
a different
show examples
 style.For
exmple
Correct your spelling
example
,visitors will not travel
second
Correct article usage
a second
show examples
 time when local
citizens
 decorate their wall used mismatching
color
Change the spelling
colour
show examples
 which left
a
Change the article
an
show examples
 ugly impression on the visitors.
Thus
,governments should establish a restriction
guide
Fix the infinitive
to guide
show examples
 residents
make
Fix the infinitive
to make
show examples
 local area more attractive. In summary,there are more disadvantages than advantages while
citizens
bulid
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build
 house
have
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has
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 no restriction by
government
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the government
show examples
.So,
Correct your spelling
government
goverment
Correct article usage
the goverment
show examples
 should enact a low in construction for the long-term development of
city
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the city
show examples
.
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To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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