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Band 6

Some people think that introducing new technology can improve people's quality of life in the developing countries. However, others believe that free education should be offered. Discuss both views and give your own opinion

#people #technology #quality #life #countries #education
Education and
technology
both
 are accelerating
the
Correct article usage
a
show examples
 better future. Some
people
 think that nation’s standard of living could be increased by commencing the
technology
 but other
opion
Correct your spelling
option
options
 to the costless study. According to
me
Correct pronoun usage
my
show examples
,
both
 the factors are equally responsible which I shall discuss in
upcoming
Correct article usage
the upcoming
show examples
 paragraphs with my own opinion.
Firstly
, looking towards new
technology
, necessity is the mother of invention.
By upgrading
Change preposition
Upgrading
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 our tools of
technology
 could solve the drastic problems that we are facing in today’s world.
For example
, using hydro or electrical transportation would
leads
Change the verb form
lead
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 to
the
Correct article usage
an
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 air pollution free environment, no global warming and use recycling and biodegradable products for
domestic
Add an article
the domestic
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 purpose would eliminate human to cater
the
Change preposition
for the
show examples
 problem of
atmosphere
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the atmosphere
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.
Secondly
, colonization into other planet
bring
Change the verb form
brings
show examples
 the
second
 chance for
human
Replace the word
humanity
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 to survive,
for instance
, according to the survey conducted by the NASA stated that moving into the new planet and restart the life over there will be end up soon in 2025.
This
 is
also
 a piece of
technology
 which support
the
Remove the article
apply
show examples
people
’s life. Education is the right of every individual and the backbone of every nation in order to develop it economically and financially.
However
, in many countries, studying
into
Change preposition
in
show examples
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
colleges and universities could be
Add an article
a challenge
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challenge
Change the form of the verb
challenging
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 for them because of not enough to pay the course fee.
Study
Add an article
The study
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 brings the fascination among
people
 to learn the morality, equality and have
sense
Add an article
a sense
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 of fraternity towards nature and social groups around them.
For instance
,
mindset
Add an article
the mindset
a mindset
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 of every
people
 would be more careful and concerned about the development of the country. In conclusion, I believe that
,
Remove the comma
apply
show examples
both
requires
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require
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 equal
attentions
Correct your spelling
attention
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 in order to the development and welfare of the
people
 in any country.
Both
plays
Change the verb form
play
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 their magnificent role
into
Change preposition
in
show examples
 the country.
Submitted by sachinjaat224 on

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