IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 3

While mobile phones have many advantages a number of problems have also resulted from them or the ways in which they are used. What are some of those problems? What solutions can you suggest for solving these problems.

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Today, one can not think
life
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of life
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 without a mobile, as there are
plathora
Correct your spelling
plethora
 of benefits
however
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, we can not ignore the drawback arisen due to it and in the manner of its usage.
This
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 essay would discuss
about
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apply
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the problems of it and the probable solutions for the same. There are mainly two types of drawbacks.
First
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, its rays are harmful
for
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to
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 the brain, and
human
Correct article usage
the human
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 memory system and
Second
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, its
use
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 while walking or driving becomes
reason
Add an article
the reason
a reason
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 for
number
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a number
the number
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 of accidents.
for example
Linking Words
, we have read a number of time in the newspaper that while driving a vehicle driver loses his balance as he was using his mobile and thrashes people who
walks
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walk
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 along the road. To reduce the harmful rays, the
law maker
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lawmaker
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 should draft policies of mobile manufacturing in a way that endanger the public at least possible manner and for the
use
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 of cell phone while driving, walking and running, the technology should
built
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build
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 and fit in a vehicle so that a person cannot
use
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 it when he is on the vehicle. To illustrate, there is a technology in the new cars that
it
Correct pronoun usage
apply
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ring siren when the driver does not tie the seat belt. To conclude,
a
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apply
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proper
use
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 of mobile can be beneficial
whearas
Correct your spelling
whereas
wrong
Correct article usage
the wrong
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use
Use synonyms
 may cause
for
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apply
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a big problem.

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Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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