24. In the future, there will be a higher proportion of older people than younger people in many countries. Why is this? Is this a positive or negative development?

#future #proportion #people #countries #development

Recent years has seen a surge in

ageing

Correct article usage

the ageing

show examples

population

all over the world. In many

countries

Add a comma

,countries

show examples

the older generation is outgrowing the younger generations due to the advancement in medicine. In my opinion,

this

trend will have a negative impact rather than a positive impact on the economy.

This

essay will examine the reasons in favour of the said viewpoint.

To begin

with

Add a comma

,with

show examples

currently, the world is experiencing a silver tsunami. As the aged

population

outnumbers the younger, government bodies will have to pump in large sums of money for their care and support.

Additionally

, authorities have to spend more on pension funds, subsidies for the elderly as well as construct hospice homes.

For instance

, in

Singapore

Add a comma

,Singapore

show examples

the majority of the

population

constitutes of

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

aged people and a major portion of the government spending goes to the support for the elderly. It can lead to an imbalance in the economy as well as

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

society.

Therefore

, increasing

ageing

Correct article usage

the ageing

show examples

population

is a negative development for a nation.

Secondly

, the dwindling number of

younger

Add an article

the younger

show examples

generation will adversely affect the economy. As the aged

population

grows it leads to a shortage of

able bodied

Add a hyphen

able-bodied

show examples

manpower needed to perform various jobs.

For example

, logistics firms

requires

Change the verb form

require

show examples

young

bloods

Change the wording

blood

types of blood

drops of blood

show examples

to do deliveries, work with heavy lifting

equipments

Change the wording

equipment

types of equipment

pieces of equipment

show examples

, driving heavy-duty vehicles etc which can prove to be quite challenging for older people. So, it is always beneficial for a country if

the

Correct article usage

show examples

large part of the

population

are youngsters. To conclude, it is argued that the number of elderly will be more than that of the younger generation in the near future.

However

this

phenomenon is a negative development as it impedes a nation's economic progression.

Submitted by binie005 on Tue Mar 23 2021

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8Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
1Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
13Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

280 words

6.50

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 9.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 8.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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24. In the future, there will be a higher proportion of older people than younger people in many countries. Why is this? Is this a positive or negative development?

Many people leave their country and go to other countries to live and work. why do you think it is happening? do the advantages of this trend outweights its disadvantages?

The rise of social media platforms has made it easier for people to vent their frustrations and complaints publicly. What is the consequence of this trend? Is there any benefit to expressing complaints on social media?

The gap between the rich and the poor is increasingly wide, as poor people become poorer and rich people become richer. What problems could this situations casue??what are the solutions to address those problems??

Some people believe that tourist should accept social and environmental responsibility while other believe that tourists should not accept any responsibility at all. To what extent do you agree or disagree.

Some people think that the best way to run a business is within the family. What are the advantages and disadvantages of a family-run business?