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Band 6

The continued rise in the world’s population is the greatest problem faced by humanity at the present time. What are the causes of this continued rise? Do you agree that it is the greatest problem faced by humanity?

#rise #world’s #population #humanity #time
Over the past few decades, there
were
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was
show examples
 a significant increase in
world’s
Correct article usage
the world’s
show examples
 human
population
. The majority believes that overpopulation might lead to problems and negatively impact
on
Change preposition
apply
show examples
society.
This
 essay will discuss some causes why
this
 has occurred and I completely agree that continues growth of
population
Correct article usage
the population
show examples
 might have a negative impact on society. One of the main factors driving
population
 growth
is
Correct your spelling
in
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 advanced medicine. The continuous improvements in
healthcare
Add an article
the healthcare
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 industry have helped many
people
 to stay healthy, live longer and improve
overall
Correct pronoun usage
their overall
show examples
 quality of life.
Firstly
, medical facilities use
latest
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the latest
show examples
 technology to effectively treat patients and develop a new solution to almost any illness.
For example
: 3D printing is a new tool
that
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
used by doctors
which
Correct pronoun usage
that
show examples
 shows all problematic areas inside and allow patients to have an organ built specifically to replace the faulty ones. Another important factor is that the world is more educated than ever before. Educated
people
 feel safe and secure, they are financially stable and
therefore
 they can afford to have more children.
However
, I agree that
explosion
Correct article usage
the explosion
show examples
 of the world
population
 leads to
number
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a number
the number
show examples
 of issues in society, especially in underdeveloped countries. One of the biggest challenges of our time remains poverty, as Government are not able to provide basic needs
such
Add the preposition
with such
show examples
food
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as food
show examples
, clean drinking water, education, and healthcare.
Besides
,
people
 living in unhealthy conditions are engaged in criminal activity.
For instance
,
people
 who are having less wealth
are often experience
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often experience
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 stress and anxiety, which puts a strain on
person
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a person
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 or family, and
this
 can lead to troubles
such
 as violent or property crimes. To conclude, there
are
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is
show examples
number
Change the article
a number
the number
show examples
 of factors which creates continuous growth of
overall
Correct article usage
the overall
show examples
population
 and I consent that
this
 is one of the main problems the world facing today.
Nevertheless
, I strongly believe that the Government’s are taking
required
Correct article usage
the required
show examples
 actions to mitigate and reduce
negative
Correct article usage
the negative
show examples
 consequences of overpopulation.
Submitted by red-sonya5 on

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