Teenagers who commit serious crimes, such as burglary or murder, should be treated in the same way as adults who commit crimes. Discuss the advantages and disadvantages of this and give your own opinion.

It is often argued that adolescents who are found guilty of homicide or theft should be punished in the same way as adults that commit
crimes
. There are some advantages to
this
but there are many disadvantages that outweigh
this
decision. In my opinion, teenagers should not be exposed to the same punishments that are given to adult criminals. On the one hand, putting young people who commit
crimes
in jail with adult criminals could help them to understand the gravity of their actions.
This
would
also
prevent them from committing
further
crimes
, at least temporarily.
On the other hand
, young people are likely to be influenced negatively by the bad company they find in prison. While they are still young they are too inexperienced to deal with some of the situations that are commonly found in prison,
such
as physical or sexual abuse. In
this
environment
Add a comma
,environment
show examples
they will probably develop a negative self-imagine as a criminal that might
last
the rest of their lives.
By contrast
, in a juvenile detention
Change the spelling
centre
show examples
center
Add a comma
,center
show examples
they could be taught a skill and develop a positive self-imagine.
Ideally
Add a comma
,Ideally
show examples
they would be able to get a job and function normally in society when they get out. In conclusion, there are more drawbacks than benefits to treating teenagers who commit
crimes
like adults. They are still in their formative years and able to be rehabilitated. I believe that teenagers who commit
crimes
have had difficult lives until that time and deserve a
second
chance.
Submitted by bene.zarpe on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

You are not ready for IELTS Speaking, if you

  • Can’t speak smoothly without pauses.
  • Use simple words and lack vocabulary.
  • Feel nervous and anxious when speaking.
Topic Vocabulary:
  • deterrent effect
  • equality before the law
  • psychological development
  • rehabilitation prospects
  • incarcerating
  • hardened criminals
  • tailoring punitive measures
  • developmental aspects
What to do next:
Look at other essays:

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

Learn how to write high-scoring essays with powerful words.
Download Free PDF and start improving you writing skills today!