Many offenders commit their crimes after serving the first punishment. Why is this happening, and what measures can be taken to tackle this problem?

#offenders #crimes #first #punishment #measures

It is a commonly known fact that the majority of criminals do not stop after their

first

punishment and violate the law again.

This

essay will

first

suggest that unbearable living

conditions

in jails are the primary reasons for

this

phenomenon and

then

submit reconstruction of the facilities for serving a sentence as the foremost remedy. Living

conditions

in the majority of prisons do not foster offenders to improve. Namely, their life dramatically changes as they lack basic amenities,

such

as hot water or a private toilet, alongside they are treated in a cruel way by the staff.

For example

, according to the documentary released recently, a fair number of people, who committed a repeated offence, claim that because of the systematic humiliation and cruelty which they have been witnessing for many years, they did not feel comfortable and saw no alternative perspectives for themselves in the real world. A possible solution would be improving the quality of facilities where sentenced people are supposed to live.

In other words

, in order to be eager to improve, residents need to have humble, but normal living

conditions

and be sure that they are entitled to have food and medical care on time.

For example

, according to world statistics, there are 50% fewer repeated crimes in those countries where criminals live their normal life on the territory of jails, being restricted only in travelling and some kinds of entertainment. In conclusion, living

conditions

in most prisons do not encourage criminals to become

Add an article

show examples

better member of society and a possible remedy for the prevention of repeated offences might be improving the circumstances in which these people stay.

Submitted by slkmihail on Tue Mar 30 2021

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

Paragraph 1 - Introduction

Sentence 1 - Background statement
Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
Sentence 3 - Thesis
Sentence 4 - Outline sentence

Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 4 - Conclusion

Sentence 1 - Summary
Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Do you want to check your IELTS essays?

Submit unlimited essays, letters and charts. Sign up right now and start improving your writing skills.

6Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
1Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
1Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

273 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 8.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 8.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 5.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

🚀 Prepare for IELTS writing section today!

Unlimited Task 1 checks
Get all the feedback you need to keep improving your charts and letters.
Unlimited Task 2 checks
Practice and perfect your skills with essays.
Personalized suggestions
Know how to boost your score.
Detailed mistakes analysis
Get instant feedback. Spot every mistake.
Topic ideas generator
Get topic-specific ideas to enhance your writing.
Vocabulary helper
Get the right words for any topic.
Progress tracking
Track your writing improvements.

Topic Vocabulary:

recidivism
rehabilitation programs
social stigma
ex-convicts
reintegration
support systems
mental health issues
addiction problems
criminal networks
incarceration

What to do next:

Look at other essays:

4
band
Foreign language should be part of curriculum of the school. Do you agree or disagree?
Nowadays, we find no difficulty of learning from every corner of the world thanks to the development of the Internet. The advances of the Internet and communication technology as well form a new thinking of the world: the world is flat. In this world, language is the most important factor preventing us from living together, communicating and learning cultures of each other. To this end, I strongly agree that foreign language should be a part of curriculum in high schools.
8
band
You recently attended a meeting at a hotel. When you returned home, you found you had left some important papers at the hotel. Write a letter to the manager of the hotel. In your letter: Say where you think you left the papers Explain why they are so important Tell the manager what you want him/her to do
I am writing this letter regarding some documents that I left at your hotel's meeting hall. I attended a company meeting at your conference hall last Saturday, October 9th and when I came back home after that meeting , I found I did not have my important file in my bag then I remembered maybe I forgot my documents in the meeting hall .
7
band
Some people think that schools should invest more money in technology, such as more computers, while others think more money should be spent on teachers. Discuss both sides and give your opinion.
People are divided on their opinion about the budgeting of the educational sector. Some hold the view that a high proportion of the budget should be spared to purchase laptops and tablets; however, others think that well-known teachers should be hired even if they demand higher salaries. In my opinion, I am convinced that both of these things are crucial for better educational aspects so equal funding should be given because of the reasons that I will outline in this essay.
5
band
Some people believe that studying at university or college is the best route to a successful career, while others believe that it is better to get a job straight after school. Discuss both views and give your opinion.
People are divided in their opinions regarding necessity of tertiary education in 21-st century in order to attain a successful career. While others believe that gaining employment straight after school is a key for favourable results in occupation,
4
band
People who do not use social media networks* will always fall behind in career development opportunities. To what extent do you feel that this is an accurate and important prediction?
Nowadas by expanding the Internet, individuals are facing many newborn social media. Using these facilities has benefits and drawbacks.

Many offenders commit their crimes after serving the first punishment. Why is this happening, and what measures can be taken to tackle this problem?

Fully explain your ideas

Foreign language should be part of curriculum of the school. Do you agree or disagree?

Some people think that schools should invest more money in technology, such as more computers, while others think more money should be spent on teachers. Discuss both sides and give your opinion.

Some people believe that studying at university or college is the best route to a successful career, while others believe that it is better to get a job straight after school. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

People who do not use social media networks* will always fall behind in career development opportunities. To what extent do you feel that this is an accurate and important prediction?