Films and computer games which contain violence are very popular. people believe they have a negative effect on society and so should be banned. Other people, however, say they are just harmless and help people to relax. Discuss both these points of view and give your own opinion.

#films #computer #games #violence #people #effect #society #points

The effect of violent television and video

games

Remove the article

apply

show examples

society is a grave concern. While many

people

argue the violent programmes ought to be banned because of their bad influence on

people

especially children,

other

Correct pronoun usage

others

show examples

believe that they are

good

Add an article

a good

show examples

source of entertainment. In my opinion, their influence on

people

is harmful and

hence

, they should be regulated. In

this

essay, I will explain my viewpoint with relevant examples.

To begin

with,

this

is quite obvious that video films, serial and online

games

are mere mediums of enjoyment and relaxation. It equips the audience with a thrilling experience.

This

could satisfy or entertain those who are more adventurous and evoking an adrenaline rush inside them.

For example

super hero

Correct your spelling

superhero

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movies are very popular among the messes due to

this

Correct determiner usage

these

show examples

features.

Therefore

people

should realise

this

as a fictional form of arts.

On the contrary

, studies

has

Change the verb form

have

show examples

shown the

inconsist

Correct your spelling

inconsistent

exposure to dirty language and bad conduct adversely influences

people

and they begin to perceive violence as normal.

For instance

, according to a recent study, children

regularly

Correct pronoun usage

who regularly

show examples

play aggressive video

games

, tend to be more aggressive and impulsive. Once violence becomes normalised in their psyche, they stop seeing it as a crime. Unfortunately,

this

give

Change the verb form

gives

show examples

rise to criminal tendencies in them. I personally think that

such

programmes need to be regulated since they are harmful to individuals as well as

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

society. In conclusion, films, serials and online

games

could satisfy and relax the audiences.

However

, I personally think that

violence

Replace the word

violent

show examples

content ought to be regulated because it could harmful

nature

Fix the infinitive

to nature

show examples

Submitted by o_unanan on Sat Apr 03 2021

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9Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
2Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
12Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

261 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 9.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 9.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Films and computer games which contain violence are very popular. people believe they have a negative effect on society and so should be banned. Other people, however, say they are just harmless and help people to relax. Discuss both these points of view and give your own opinion.

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

In today's world, private companies rather than government pay for and conduct most scientific research. Do you think the advantages outweigh disadvantages?

Art classes, such as drawing and painting, are as important to a child’s development as other subjects, so it should be compulsory in high school. To what extent do you agree or disagree.

A lot of places in the world rely on tourism as a main source of income. Unfortunately, tourism can also be a source of problems if it is not managed correctly.

Some people think that a good diet and exercise are not necessary for a healthy and long life. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Cooking food is a waste of time in today’s hectic life. Fast food restaurants are helpful in modern living and it is less stressful. Do you agree or disagree?