One of the consequences of improved medical care is that people are living longer and life expectancy is increasing.

In
this
modern era, Citizen
are
Change the verb form
is
show examples
living
long
Add an article
a long
show examples
and very healthy life which
one
is
very
Add an article
the very
a very
show examples
great thing about human due to changing into health care facilities. In
this
competitive era,
people
have
forget
Change the verb form
forgotten
show examples
to take care of themselves. Nowadays,
people
are really thankful
to
Change the preposition
for
show examples
the
advance
Replace the word
advanced
show examples
technology
into
Change preposition
in
show examples
the medical field. There
are
Change the verb form
is
show examples
number
Change the article
a number
the number
show examples
of advantages of it. The
first
one
is, these days all decease’s surgeries are available
also
health field have advanced machines for all type of illness.
For example
, The survey
which
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
was conducted by
google
Change the capitalization
Google
show examples
shows that
,
Remove the comma
apply
show examples
70% of cancer patients having well improvement
into
Change preposition
in
show examples
their health
into
Change preposition
in
show examples
the
last
10 years which
one
is
very
Correct article usage
a very
show examples
serious illness because of the
high level
Add a hyphen
high-level
show examples
technology
Change preposition
of technology
show examples
.
Moreover
, the
second
one
is, these days the
number
of intelligent doctors
are
Change the verb form
is
show examples
rising
which
Correct pronoun usage
who
show examples
have really great knowledge
also
who have studied from abroad.
For example
, in the
last
year
Add a comma
,year
show examples
one
27 years old doctor saves 2 children’s life who was attached their body with each other by born and 2 doctors were already said they were not live more.
However
,it
also
has disadvantage
at
Change preposition
to
show examples
some
extant
Correct your spelling
extent
show examples
. In
this
technological era, the
number
of payment for treatment is
also
rising. For some decease’s surgery doctors are offering
lot
Change the article
a lot
show examples
of
money
to the patients. Provide huge
money
is affordable to rich person but for poor
people
Add a comma
,people
show examples
it is
very
Add an article
a very
show examples
tough situation.
For example
,
times
Correct article usage
the times
show examples
of India published
a news
Remove the article
news
a piece of news
show examples
in which a doctor ask for 5 lakh cash to the patient for their illness surgery. To sum up, there
are
Change the verb form
is
show examples
number
Change the article
a number
the number
show examples
of advantages compare to the disadvantages but who can afford to spend
money
this
technology is a blessed for him but for poor
people
they have
major
Add an article
a major
show examples
question about
money
.
Submitted by shubhampatel19021 on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

Learn how to write high-scoring essays with powerful words.
Download Free PDF and start improving you writing skills today!
Topic Vocabulary:
  • consequences
  • improved medical care
  • life expectancy
  • advantages
  • disadvantages
  • healthcare
  • quality of life
  • population
  • economic burden
  • elderly
  • dependency
  • technology
  • ethical concerns
What to do next:
Look at other essays: