Some people believe famous people's support towards international aid organizations draws the attention to problems, while others think celebrities make the problems less important. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

#people #support #aid #organizations #attention #celebrities

Celebrity has always been a crucial icon for many international aid organizations,

however

people

are still having a debate over whether the effects they brought are beneficial or negative. In

this

essay, I will elaborate on both statements what has been mentioned above. Famous

people

such

as worldwide actors or million-subscribed

youtubers

Correct your spelling

YouTubers

, all have great influence over their fans or subscribers.

In addition

, international aid organizations tend to invite celebrities to be their yearly endorsements.

For example

the world vision,

they

Correct pronoun usage

apply

show examples

cooperate with different influencers each year, the will make videos and take part in charity activities, in order to draw awareness from

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

society.

This

partnership is a win-win strategy, it not only benefits the

organization

Remove the comma

apply

show examples

but

also

gain positive recognition to the celebrity.

On the other hand

, the cooperation between the organizations and the celebrities is

also

dangerous, they have to be really careful who to team with. If the celebrity

cause

Change the verb form

causes

show examples

a scandal during his or her endorsement with the

organization

people

will instantly focus on the scandal rather than the important events the

organization

is working on.

More over

Correct your spelling

Moreover

show examples

, it will probably bring

negative

Add an article

a negative

show examples

image to the

organization

Also

people

are often more interested in the famous

people

itself

Correct pronoun usage

themselves

show examples

, rather than the

organization

they represented, which often make the problems less important. All in all,

although

celebrities could take the focus off of the problems due to their popularity, my belief is that their contributions to international aid organisations can surely make problems noticed.

Submitted by yliitning0123 on Tue Apr 20 2021

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Fully explain your ideas

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8Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
2Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
8Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

248 words

<4

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 4.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

6.5

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Topic Vocabulary:

endorse
international aid organizations
public awareness
amplify
advocacy
systemic change
oversimplification
trivialization
undermining
severity
misinformed advocacy
distorts
hamper
guided by experts
constructive
strategically

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Some people believe famous people's support towards international aid organizations draws the attention to problems, while others think celebrities make the problems less important. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

Fully explain your ideas

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

Some people believe The purpose of education should be helping to individual to become useful for society while others believe it should be help individuals to achieve their ambitions. Discuss both sites and give your opinion

In some countries it is thought advisable that children begin formal education at 4 years old while in others they do not have to start school until they are seven or eight. How far do you agree with either of these views?

In some countries the lifestyle of people is changing rapidly, and this affects family relationship. Do the advantages of this trend outweigh the disadvantages?

It is observed that in many countries not enough students are choosing to study science as a subject. What are the causes? And what will be the effects on society? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from own knowledge or experience.

New technologies have changed the way children spend their free time. Do you think the advantages of this trend outweigh the disadvantages?