IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 6

Smoking not only harms the smoker but also those who are nearby. Therefore , smoking should be banned in public places. To what extent do you agree or disagree.

#smoker #places
Nowadays, many people are using smoke, which can harm themselves and around persons.
Although
 smoking in public can bring less emission, personally I believe that some restriction should be set for them. Smoking in public areas is one of the negative aspects of society that we cannot prevent. But smoking treatment can be restricted. It means that the government can provide some specific
places
 for them and they use a wide range of benefit from smoking in an open area. It is obvious, some equipment
such
 as air conditions can be beneficial for them if those install in these
places
. In
this
 way, not only people who want to smoke in the open area benefit from less pollution but
also
 they do not harm anyone else.
on the other hand
, public
places
,
such
 as restaurants, is a place for everyone and some negative personal behaviour should be banned by the government.
furthermore
, in these ,areas people should respect each other and prevent some individuals treatments which not suitable for all and do that in their private
places
such
 as their home. In the conclusion, In my opinion, there could be some specific
places
 for smoking to prevent some negative aspects of
this
 phenomenon,
Submitted by maleki.ali94 on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: