IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 5

As a result of tourism and the increasing number of people travelling, there is a growing demand for more flights. What problems does this have on the environment? What measures could be taken to solve the problems?

#tourism #people #demand #flights #environment #measures
Tourism
 is
main
Change the article
the main
show examples
 factor
of
Change preposition
in
show examples
 developing the transport infrastructure. The government is building a lot of
airport
Change to a plural noun
airports
show examples
 to upgrade the
tourism
 level in the country.
However
, the impact of
plane
Add an article
the plane
a plane
show examples
 using
to
Change preposition
on
show examples
 ecology is colossal.
This
 essay will analyze the problem and find
solution
Add an article
a solution
the solution
show examples
 for that issue.
To begin
with
Add a comma
,with
show examples
 that planes, increase the pollution in the environment. It is enormous problem and it needs a serious
solution
. Many people use
such
 services to explore
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
new places
,
Remove the comma
apply
show examples
 because it is saving
a
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
time and comfortable. People, who living near airport suffer by pollution from carbon dioxide, which
are
Change the verb form
is
show examples
 produced by
plane
Add an article
the plane
a plane
show examples
 engine. The temperature of
earth
Add an article
the earth
show examples
if
Correct your spelling
is
show examples
 growing every year. The
recently
Change the adverb
recent
show examples
 research
shown
Add the auxiliary verb
has shown
showed
show examples
 that the temperature of Earth rose to 5-6-degree Cesium. It has
significant
Add an article
a significant
show examples
 negative impact
to
Change preposition
on
show examples
the
Change the article
apply
show examples
nature’s future. To solve
this
 problem,
authority
Add an article
the authority
show examples
 should increase the taxes and cost of tickets and fuel.
This
solution
 will decrease air pollution
on
Change preposition
in
show examples
atmosphere
Add an article
the atmosphere
show examples
.
Plane
do
Change the verb form
does
show examples
 not have another kind of fuel. They cannot consume hydrogen or
another
Correct quantifier usage
other
show examples
 gas, which do not have
a
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
negative remains,
such
 as water.
In
Change preposition
On
show examples
Correct article usage
the other
show examples
other hand
Change the wording
another hand
other hands
show examples
,
this
solution
 will decrease the
tourism
 level in the country and it would have impacted negatively
to
Change preposition
on
show examples
 the economy.
However
, is the only
one
Correct quantifier usage
apply
show examples
solution
of
Change preposition
to
show examples
 the issue – increase the cost of tickets.
Tourism
 is
main
Add an article
the main
a main
show examples
 part of
economy
Add an article
the economy
show examples
;
however
, it impacts dramatically to the environment.
Plane
Add an article
The plane
A plane
show examples
 is
significant
Correct article usage
a significant
show examples
 kind of transport, which destroy the atmosphere. The government is building a lot of
airport
Change to a plural noun
airports
show examples
 to upgrade the
tourism
 level in the country, but it cost is our health.
Submitted by anjelika-mama on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

Learn how to write high-scoring essays with powerful words.
Download Free PDF and start improving you writing skills today!
Topic Vocabulary:
    What to do next:
    Look at other essays: