Some people believe that money is more important than free time for a good quality of life. Others say the opposite is true. Discuss both views. What is more important in your opinion? Give relevant examples.

Few people
beleive
Correct your spelling
believe
that only
money
is more
valuabe
Correct your spelling
valuable
and can provide good quality of
life
compared to free
time
. In my
opinion
Add a comma
,opinion
show examples
free
time
is more valuable than
money
to lead a happy and quality
life
.
Money
can be earned anytime but
time
Add an article
the time
show examples
we can regain it.
Upcoming
Add an article
The upcoming
An upcoming
show examples
paragraph will give
further
information related to my opinion. Yes ,
i
Change the capitalization
I
show examples
agree that to lead
a
Remove the article
apply
show examples
sophisticated
life
money
is important, but to continue to have that
life
they have to work hard each and every moment for
whole
Correct pronoun usage
their whole
show examples
life
without enjoying what they have earned and
also
they will not have
few
Correct article usage
a few
show examples
memorable
momemnts
Correct your spelling
moments
with their loved ones.
For instance
,
Film
Change preposition
in Film
show examples
celebraties
Correct your spelling
celebrities
, They need to travel all the
time
to
Change preposition
apply
show examples
outdoor for
stooting
Correct your spelling
shooting
and to earn
money
due to which they cannot stay for
long
Correct article usage
a long
show examples
period with their family and
also
can spend
time
for
self
Correct pronoun usage
themselves
show examples
.But we change
this
by limiting our works and by giving priority to family than
money
.
Secondly
,
person
Add an article
a person
the person
show examples
with free
time
,
This
man can plan his
time
with family ,
self growth
Add a hyphen
self-growth
show examples
and
also
spend some
time
on his hobbies to lead and pleasant and
happly
Correct your spelling
happy
happily
life
with his own rules.
Money
is
also
important to survive but not as much as
time
. We can earn
money
which
help
Change the verb form
helps
show examples
us feed and get what is is needed.
For example
, Workers in factories or any other
industies
Correct your spelling
industries
,
they
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
are happy with the income they earn and
spendthe
Correct your spelling
spend the
remaining available
time
with family. In conclusion, In each and every person
life
money
and
time
plays
a
Change the article
the
show examples
main role and are important. But when compared in between them , We can't get
time
which is lost but can earn
money
which we don't have. So
Time
is more important than
money
Submitted by gteja2502 on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately

Linking words are very important in your essay.

To score effectively on your IELTS exam, you should make an effort to implement short concise sentences coupled with linking words.

Almost every sentence in your essay should have a linking word of some sort.

In fact, the only sentences that can omit linking words are your background sentence and thesis.

Linking word examples:

  • firstly
  • secondly
  • thirdly
  • in additional
  • moreover
  • also
  • for example
  • for instance
  • therefore
  • however
  • although
  • even though
  • despite

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: