In many countries, traditional customs are being lost. Why do you think this is? What can parents and schools do to keep traditional customs alive?

#countries #customs #parents #schools

For many people in the

world

Add a comma

,world

show examples

their culture is what defines them and their society. It influences what they believe in as well as their lifestyle.

Although

Remove the comma

apply

show examples

older generation follow their culture as much as they can, some people of the family are slowly

Replace the word

losing

show examples

loosing

Correct your spelling

losing

show examples

touch with their traditional

customs

This

can be

beacuse

Correct your spelling

because

of several reasons which

this

essay discusses.

To begin

with,

customs

are certain activities that have long been

practiced

Change the spelling

practised

show examples

by a family. These

customs

take part in several stages of our life including

Change preposition

apply

show examples

our birth, marriage and death.

However

, our world has become

Correct your spelling

fast-paced

show examples

fact-paced

Correct your spelling

fast-paced

show examples

and more competitive than ever.

As a result

, it has become increasingly difficult to take out time to indulge in ethnic traditions.

For example

, in my

religion

Add a comma

,religion

show examples

there is a custom to pray to the sun every morning but sometimes I don't have time for it as my morning commute to work takes me 2 hours.

Additionally

schools

are becoming more focused to teach skills

which

Correct pronoun usage

that

show examples

are more inclined towards technical knowledge and are spending

less

Change the quantifier

fewer

show examples

resources on providing means to learn about the old practices.

This

has led to a

lost

Replace the word

loss

show examples

of ethnic values and

customs

but there are some remedies that can fix

this

. The key to address the issue of losing our traditional culture is through our parents and

schools

Firstly

schools

should introduce classes and material that focus on the importance of

balance

Add an article

the balance

a balance

show examples

of work-life and conventional practices.

This

will not only improve their quality of life in future but

also

help young children to know their roots and get familiar with some of the conventional activities.

Finally

, parents should get their kids involved in their religious practices as much as they can so that they can establish a connection between the kids and the long-established tradition. To conclude, with the help of

schools

and parents the lost values of our long-established tradition can be recovered. Having a way for the people to connect to their old

customs

can enable them to understand and practice those values and activities again.

Submitted by jatin.arora08 on Wed Apr 28 2021

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

for example
for instance
to illustrate this
to give a clear example
such as
namely
to illustrate
take, for example

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Do you want to check your IELTS writing?

Submit unlimited essays, letters and charts. Sign up right now and start improving your writing skills.

10Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
2Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
14Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

343 words

5.00

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 5.0

Complete response

7.5

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

🚀 Prepare for IELTS writing section today!

Unlimited Task 1 checks
Get all the feedback you need to keep improving your charts and letters.
Unlimited Task 2 checks
Practice and perfect your skills with essays.
Personalized suggestions
Know how to boost your score.
Detailed mistakes analysis
Get instant feedback. Spot every mistake.
Topic ideas generator
Get topic-specific ideas to enhance your writing.
Vocabulary helper
Get the right words for any topic.
Progress tracking
Track your writing improvements.

What to do next:

Look at other essays:

6
band
Write about the following topic. Information technology is changing many aspects of our lives and now dominates our home,leisure and work activities. To what extent do the benefits of information technology outweigh the disadvantages? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.
In contemporary society, the constant emergence of advanced technological products significantly influences various aspects of our lives, including work, education, and leisure. Providing a context for this discussion, it is essential to recognize the profound impact technology has on individual behavior and societal dynamics.
5.5
band
English Learning, I'm looking to improve our relationship by setting some boundaries. Explain how you want to be treated in these sessions, using clear examples of your own to support the answer.
In recent times, it has become evident that English is given the first priority among all other languages. People from every age group find English to be a very important barrier to maintaining a good image in society. Though this may result in the extinction of other regional languages, I believe that the acquisition of English language skills is currently very crucial.
4
band
Today, many people do not know their neighboars in large cities. What problems does this cause? What can be done about this?
Nowadays, there are many arguements about the connection in community. Typically, many citizens do not have any information about their neighboars in urban areas. This problem is attributable to the lack of leisure time and the dependence of technology in digital era but can be addressed by encouraging people attend to more public activities.
4
band
some people believe that air travel should be restricted because it cause serious pollution and uses up the worlds 's fuel resources .to what extent do you agree or disagree.
Some might argue, that air travel is causing major harm to the environment in the matter of burning a tremendous amount of fossil fuel each year and depleting the world oil reserve, and demand that it should be limited. Although, it's irrefutable that flying jets cause damage to the environment, I, however, firmly disagree that it is beneficial to minimize the number of flights or restrict them. This essay addresses the reasons behind my opposition.
7
band
Environmental problem such as pollution and climate change affect all the people in the world. Although global decisions are made to reduce these problems , the solutions are not effective. How can these problems be solved?
Pollution , global warming and the loss of biodiversity , caused mainly by the phenomenon of industrialization and urbanization , are some of the serious problems mankind is facing nowadays. If this disturbance of ecological balance is not checked , the future of man and nature will be in danger. This essay states that both individuals and non -government agencies have a major role to play in arresting this trend.

In many countries, traditional customs are being lost. Why do you think this is? What can parents and schools do to keep traditional customs alive?

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

English Learning, I'm looking to improve our relationship by setting some boundaries. Explain how you want to be treated in these sessions, using clear examples of your own to support the answer.

Today, many people do not know their neighboars in large cities. What problems does this cause? What can be done about this?

some people believe that air travel should be restricted because it cause serious pollution and uses up the worlds 's fuel resources .to what extent do you agree or disagree.

Environmental problem such as pollution and climate change affect all the people in the world. Although global decisions are made to reduce these problems , the solutions are not effective. How can these problems be solved?