Some people say that music is a good way of bringing people of different cultures and ages together. To what extend do you agree or disagree with this opinions?

#people #music #cultures #ages

singing is a stress-buster for everyone.It helps to take out a person from depression and the public can live happily. In the world, there are different type of communities living together but every culture follow the different style of living. So I agree with

this

statement that some

people

believe,

music

helps to bring human beings and ages together.I will mention my views in the following paragraphs.

To begin

with,

Firstly

every community has dissimilar

music

and every type of song from each corner of the world is on Social media like you-tube,Facebook and so-on. So when the public

tolisten

Correct your spelling

to listen

these things

then

they would be interested in search about that particular community which brings them close to each other.

Secondly

,when a motivational song is heard by any group of age

then

also

makes a way to join the teenagers, adults and older individuals.

For example

- On occasional event, Inhabitants,teenagers,adults and old

people

dance on only that song which has a positive impact on every person. On another side of the mirror, It has some negative effects

also

on a generation because nowadays lyrics have a lot of discrimination,drugs which make part of communities and juveniles start spoiling their lives due to drugs.

Moreover

, the Modern crowd forget their rituals and holy books which will be

the

Change the article

apply

show examples

disastrous for mankind.

For instance

, the public is busy with jobs and when they are free

then

they spend all time to spent free time to

listen

Add the preposition

tolisten

show examples

these songs. To summarise , I strongly agree with

this

statement that

music

relieves the pain of tensions or loneliness.So,

music

bringing

people

together in the modern time.

Music

also

helps to take care of unhealthy

people

Submitted by kuldeepmalaudh on Thu Apr 29 2021

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9Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
2Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
3Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

277 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 6.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 6.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 8.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Topic Vocabulary:

universal language
evoke
connect
diverse audiences
cultural exchange
generational gaps
shared experiences
unifying force

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