Some people think that zoos are cruel and all the zoos should be closed. However, others think that zoos are useful to protect rare animals. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

#people #zoos #animals

In the present age, whether zoological

parks

should be allowed to function is

matter

Add an article

a matter

show examples

of controversy. Some people assert that these places are harmful

for

Change the preposition

show examples

the

animals

, whereas others believe that they provide a place for their protection. I think that some zoological

parks

are great if they provide the

appropiate

Correct your spelling

appropriate

environment to keep them. There are several reasons why some part of

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

society believe that zoos are cruel.

First

, many of these places

that

Correct pronoun usage

apply

show examples

use

animals

for the sake of entertainment and keep the creatures in closed spaces.

Therefore

, these surroundings do not offer them the freedom they need to live a natural

live

Replace the word

life

show examples

and many

start

Change to a plural noun

starts

show examples

getting sick.

In addition

to that, these living beings are not provided with the required nutrition that they normally find in their original surroundings,

therefore

, they get weaker physically and their life span shortens. To illustrate

further

one of these natural

parks

in my hometown was closed

Remove the comma

apply

show examples

because the

animals

were in a detrimental condition due to an

innapropriate

Correct your spelling

inappropriate

artificial environment and their poor health.

On the other hand

, some

parks

are found to provide good care for the living

species

adapting

Change preposition

to an

show examples

environment that simulates very closely their natural atmosphere,

consequently

, they can develop in a normal way. Another aspect

that is

important from some of these adapted settings is the fact that they provide protection for some endangered

species

, facilitating the correct breeding and reproduction

avoding

Correct your spelling

avoiding

the extinction of them. To cite an example, there is

this

wildlife zoo in Australia founded by Steeve, who was widely known as “the crocodile hunter”,

This

zoo holds a

diverse

Replace the word

diversity

show examples

species

that were about to get

extincted

Correct your spelling

extinct

, now they enjoy

Change preposition

apply

show examples

a spaced ecosystem where they feel at home are fed correctly and are well cared by professionals. To conclude,

adecuated

Correct your spelling

adequate

parks

that are used to have

animals

to entertain the public can be

endagering

Correct your spelling

endangering

engaging

for the

species

that are taken unnecessarily from their native

Submitted by osw79924 on Sun May 02 2021

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Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

Summary
Restatement of thesis
Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

In conclusion
To conclude
To summarize
Finally
In a nutshell
In general

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8Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
3Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
16Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

324 words

5.50

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 8.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Topic Vocabulary:

animal welfare
conservation
captive breeding
habitat
ethical issues
zoochosis
endangered species
genetic diversity
reintroduction programs
wildlife education
sanctuary
natural living conditions
artificial environments
behavioral enrichment
ecosystem

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Some people think that zoos are cruel and all the zoos should be closed. However, others think that zoos are useful to protect rare animals. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

Include an introduction and conclusion

Many universities graduates cannot find a job in their chosen profession what factors may have caused this situation and what in your opinion should be care about it?

Nowadays, some workplaces tend to employ equal numbers of men and women workers. Do you think it is a positive or negative development?

Many students find it difficult to concentrate or pay attention at school. What are the reasons? What could be done to solve this problem?

In many countries these days, the number of people continuing their education after school has increased, and the range of courses available at universities and colleges has also increased. Do you think this is a positive or negative development?