Many people have to retire at the age 60 or 65. However, some suggest that these people should be allowed to work for as long as they wish. What are the advantages and disadvantages of this situation?

#people #age #suggest #work #situation

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the

Correct article usage

apply

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modern society, when

workers

become over around 60 years old, they retire their jobs.

Nevertheless

, some

people

argue that the retirement age should be decided by themselves.

This

essay examines both sides of

this

argument and draws the conclusion that the result of

this

trend is undesirable because of financial and physical reasons. On the one hand, those who are over 60 continue working carries some benefits. One of them is that it would be a solution to

Add an article

the labor

a labor

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labor

Change the spelling

labour

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shortage. Since we are facing declining birthrates and

aging

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ageing

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population issues, overaged

people

working would be helpful for many companies, contributing to the rise of

working

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the working

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population.

This

results in

the

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increase

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tax revenue as well.

Furthermore

, a number of

corporation

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a corporation

the corporation

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can save time for education to

workers

. If over 60 years-old

employee

Change to a plural noun

employees

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keep

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keeps

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working at the same company, the company do not need to teach them how to

work

as they know about their

work

well, which allows the other

employee

to focus on their

work

instead

of teaching new

workers

On the other hand

, the drawbacks of overaged

people

continue working should be considered.

Firstly

, it would be costly to keep hiring them

instead

young

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a young

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employee

. Since overaged

workers

are trained and skilled, companies would need to pay more salary to them than non-skilled

workers

Secondly

, there would be some risks that

employee

keep

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keeps

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working after 60 years old. As their physical strength would deteriorate with age, they might get hurt at

work

including manual

labor

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labour

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from the long-term perspective. In conclusion, while there are some upsides with overaged

people

keep working, in my opinion, the disadvantages of

this

trend outweigh the advantages when considering that the downsides may persist in the

longterm

Correct your spelling

long term

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Submitted by puffindog101 on Mon May 03 2021

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Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

for example
for instance
to illustrate this
to give a clear example
such as
namely
to illustrate
take, for example

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7
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
4
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
14
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

7.5

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

288 words

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Many people have to retire at the age 60 or 65. However, some suggest that these people should be allowed to work for as long as they wish. What are the advantages and disadvantages of this situation?

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Write a letter to the manager of the organisation where you have been working. In your letter: describe the work you have been doing explain why you can no longer do this work recommend another person who is interested in the work

Some people believe that professionals, such as doctors and engineers, should be required to work in the country where they did their training. Others believ that they should be free to work in another country if they wish.

Some people think governments should make university education free, but others think students should pay fees by themselves. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

n many countries, a small number of people earn extremely high salaries. Some people believe that this is good for the country, but others think that governments should not allow salaries above a certain level. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

Many people go to university for academic study. More people should be encouraged to do vocational training because there is a lack of qualified workers such as electricians and plumbers. To what extent do you agree or disagree?