IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 6

In some countries it is common for young people to leave home and live on their own or with friends when they finish school. Some people think this is a good idea for young people. Do you agree or disagree with this opinion give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

#countries #people #home #friends #school #idea
In the 21st century generation,
people
 are more likely to live out alone or with friends. I think it helps teenagers be independent and self-disciplinary.
Also
, I believe it is a very good idea to have a
life
 away from the
people
 who can help you the most when you start a career or
life
,
Remove the comma
apply
show examples
 because in
this
 way you can stop relying on these
people
 and start believing in yourself. To start with, many young adults find them lack social skills and domestic skills,
such
 as cooking, buying raw food, commuting to work and doing chores. Living alone or with a friend will help these
people
to
begin
Add the particle
tobegin
show examples
 understand the importance of these domestic works and in fact doing it on their own.
This
life
 is not solely about work or academic study, it
also
 contains many other unexpected things and unwanted doings.
On the other hand
, living without parents can benefit your style of living. Most young teens need to be awakened by their mothers or fathers in the early morning to go to school.
Therefore
, along with time, these
people
's ability to take care of their own living style and timetable is sorely lacking.
This
 absence of skill may cause a serious problem when one is having
first
 jobs or when they are forced to leave home to study or work somewhere far. Overall, it is a great thing for individuals to have a
life
 away from their parents. It helps build a good lifestyle and drives
people
 to do things more independently.
Submitted by willson-cot on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: