IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 5

do you agree that the advantages of cars outweigh the disadvantages?

#cars
✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
cars
Use synonyms
plays
Change the verb form
play
show examples
 a
prominant
Correct your spelling
prominent
 role in daily life as we see
almost
Correct your spelling
most
show examples
Use synonyms
people
Correct quantifier usage
all people
show examples
 have their own
cars
Use synonyms
.
although
Linking Words
cars
Use synonyms
 have some
concsequences
Correct your spelling
consequences
but
Remove the conjunction
apply
show examples
according
to
Change preposition
in
show examples
me
Add a comma
,me
show examples
cars
Use synonyms
 advantages can outweigh the disadvantages.
Use synonyms
One
Correct your spelling
On
show examples
 the
one
Use synonyms
 hand , using
cars
Use synonyms
unnecssarily
Correct your spelling
unnecessarily
 brings some problems too,like
people
Use synonyms
perfer
Correct your spelling
prefer
cars
Use synonyms
 to smaller distances where they can go by walk
esaily
Correct your spelling
easily
, which brings
lazyness
Correct your spelling
laziness
 in
people
Use synonyms
.
Moreover
Linking Words
 , some
people
Use synonyms
 drive
cars
Use synonyms
 too fast and drink alcohol while driving , which causes
enomours
Correct your spelling
enormous
 dangerous accidents. Sometimes these accidents cost a person life or near to death. Usings
cars
Use synonyms
 are more expensive
Linking Words
then
Replace the word
than
show examples
 taking public
transport
Use synonyms
.
Now a days
Correct the word
Nowadays
show examples
,
number
Change the article
the number
show examples
 of
cars
Use synonyms
 are immensely increasing which leads to the pollution.
On the other hand
Linking Words
,
cars
Use synonyms
 provide
convinience
Correct your spelling
convenience
 as well as make saving time in
this
Linking Words
 fastest generation.
People
Use synonyms
 do not have to wait for longer times to get buses or they do not have to walk so much . To add more to
this
Linking Words
 we
does
Change the verb form
do
show examples
 not
have
Add the particle
tohave
show examples
 carry so much of the wait in our hands as well as
one
Use synonyms
 can play music of their own choice and personal
cars
Use synonyms
 give more privacy while travelling
Linking Words
then
Replace the word
than
show examples
 other
transport
Use synonyms
. For
instace
Correct your spelling
instance
: you can go from
one
Use synonyms
 destination to another without wasting time
in
Change preposition
apply
show examples
waiting for buses or you can take random stops anywhere you want which is not possible
in
Change preposition
on
show examples
 public
transport
Use synonyms
.
therefore
Linking Words
, time and distance
is
Change the verb form
are
show examples
 not barriers anymore. It plays an important role especially when you have elder or sick family members at home because
its
Replace the word
it's
it is
show examples
 very for them to travel by any other means of
transport
Use synonyms
 . In
conculsion
Correct your spelling
conclusion
,
acoording
Correct your spelling
according
 to my way of thinking the advantages of
cars
Use synonyms
 can outweigh
its
Correct pronoun usage
their
show examples
disadvanges
Correct your spelling
disadvantages
 because
cars
Use synonyms
 are
such
Linking Words
 a miracle for human life if we use
it
Correct pronoun usage
them
show examples
 carefully .
Submitted by kuldeepmalaudh on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: