IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 7

Some people believe that visitors to other countries should follow local customs and behavior. Other disagree and think that the host country should welcome cultural differences. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

#people #visitors #countries #customs #behavior #host #country #differences
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While some
people
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 think that the tourists should follow local customs and attitudes where they travel to visit there due to protect local culture from changing or destroying, others, including myself, believe it is against human freedom and prophecy of developing others
cultures
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.
First
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 and foremost, individuals have been entitled to select their customs worldwide.
In other words
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, it is against humanity's right if we impose on
people
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 what they can do or do not. It is apparent that both visitors and hosts know how they should behave when confronting different
cultures
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, even if they have never seen so far.
Moreover
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, one of the spectacular aspects of the tourism industry is developing and recognizing worldwide
cultures
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. Not only is it leads to
people
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 familiar with different
cultures
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, but
also
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 it results in the spread and transfer of local culture overseas.
Therefore
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,
people
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 could feel much closer even on two different continents.
Then
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, it better accepts
people
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 with their customs and behaviours.
On the other hand
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, some
people
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 argue that foreign cloth and attitudes cause cultural disturbing in local communities and after long times it leads to vanishing local custom and behaviour. They believe visitors must follow local rules in order to protect the host culture;
however
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,
this
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 point of view against the principles of human free choice. If we observe
this
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 issue from
this
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 view, we have rejected fundamental human rights. By way of conclusion,
although
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 a large number of factors are in play when it comes to the concept role of welcome other
cultures
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, I believe the human choice right and developing different
cultures
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 are two essential items that authorities have to consider in the tourism industry.
Submitted by ali.vahdati on

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To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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