Many people now undertake extreme activities, from hang-gliding to mountain climbing. Why do people risk their lives in this way, and do you think this is a good trend? Give reasons for your answer, and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience

#people #activities #mountain #risk #lives #trend

Nowadays people are utilising their gadgets as the main factor of their lives which as well after leads to extreme activities.

Although

it is common to consider it normal and adequate, I believe that these kinds of activities can be dangerous and infringe traditional beliefs for a human being and society.

Firstly

, noncompliance with rules and lack of caution can result in the encouragement of other people’s willingness to complete

such

a thing. It is now popular for a teenager to get on the roof, despite the fact that it can bring injuries and consequences. Asking why would people do extreme

sports

is that one can get renowned and famous

likewise

naturally feel strong feelings

such

as “dopamine”.

Furthermore

, some even adore doing it, since one might be overcoming situations in their life and many call it “escaping the reality”.

Nevertheless

, I don’t endorse undertaking extreme

sports

, due to the fact that it can disseminate wrong propaganda for kids and young people, which

then

leads to a society of wrong-viewed human-kind.

For instance

, doing extreme

sports

without complying with rules like wearing a seatbelt or helmet can

consequently

bring severe injury and

perceivement

Correct your spelling

perceive men

of young people to do something extreme and afterwards becoming that “cool child” at schools. To conclude, it is prevalent that a mature person would

subsequently

believe that it is right to quit these kinds of

sports

in our civilization. Surely, it takes a lot of eagerness to do a thing like that,

however

Change the punctuation

apply

show examples

personally

Add a comma

,personally

show examples

I believe it is a trivial part of our daily lives

Remove the comma

apply

show examples

since one can merely complete a much safer performance than extreme sport.

Submitted by Dariga on Sun May 16 2021

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Use a variety of complex and simple sentences

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‘Complex’ sentences are not actually very complex; they are just two or more simple sentences put together. Putting them together makes the essay more coherent and cohesive.

Examples:

I really want to study but I’m too tired.

I wore a warm coat because the weather was cold.

If action is not taken soon on climate change, global warming will get worse.

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11Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
1Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
4Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

271 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 6.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 6.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 7.5

Complete response

7.5

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Topic Vocabulary:

Adrenaline rush
Thrill-seeking
Personal growth
Accomplishment
Resilience
Risk management
Social recognition
Adventurous spirit
Endorphins
Fatality
Risk assessment
Cultural phenomenon
Recklessness
Safety precautions
Extreme sports

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Many people now undertake extreme activities, from hang-gliding to mountain climbing. Why do people risk their lives in this way, and do you think this is a good trend? Give reasons for your answer, and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience

Use a variety of complex and simple sentences

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

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Some people think that punishment is the best way of teaching children to behave well. Others believe that it is better to reward children for good be haviour. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.