Some people believe that it is best to acceot a bad sitaution such as unsatisfactory job or shortage of money.Others think that it is better to try and imrove the situation.Both view and your opinion.

Life

Use synonyms

is full of up and downs.

Although

Linking Words

there are some people who thought it is essential to accept difficult situations and live with

Correct pronoun usage

them

show examples

, the opponents consider that it is to fight against and achieve the desired goal. I, personally, support the latter’s view since

this

Linking Words

ensures satisfaction in our

life

Use synonyms

On the other hand

Linking Words

, accepting

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

fate and living in

a undesirable situations

Correct the article-noun agreement

undesirable situations

an undesirable situation

show examples

is thought is best by some.

This

Linking Words

is because

Linking Words

otherwise

Add a comma

,otherwise

show examples

the person would feel disappointment and agony about his situation, eventually, he may unable to live

further

Linking Words

For example

Linking Words

, when a businessman lost his entire fortune, he accepted the fact and started to live with whatever he had.

However

Linking Words

this

Linking Words

scenario is extremely difficult to handle, so it would be better to try hard and make changes in

life

Use synonyms

to become successful, rather than living an odd

life

Use synonyms

. On one hand, it is obvious that fighting and trying against the mistakes and pitfalls which had encountered in our

life

Use synonyms

Remove the comma

apply

show examples

would bring happiness and content in everyone ‘s mind.

In other words

Linking Words

, achieving

goal

Add an article

a goal

the goal

show examples

is something

would

Correct pronoun usage

that would

show examples

make a

person

Replace the word

personally

show examples

meaningful and motivate to go and chase the horizon.

By contrast

Linking Words

for instance

Linking Words

, if a failed person committed suicide,

this

Linking Words

action would not save him from his problems,

instead

Linking Words

, he could have accepted the fact and started a new chapter with more energy

Linking Words

Therefore

Add the comma(s)

,Therefore

show examples

, it is better to fight the challenges which come across in the way. In conclusion, people have a different opinion on how to handle failures whether to accept or challenge

Correct pronoun usage

them

show examples

. I strongly believe that any problem is considered as an opportunity and work for it.

Sal

May 17, 2021

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12
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
1
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
10
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 9.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 7.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

274 words

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Some consumers are increasingly choosing to buy goods that are produced in their local area, rather than imported goods. What are the reasons for this? Is this a positive or a negative trend?

Example 6: Many offenders commit more crimes after serving the punishment. Why are this happening, and what measures can be taken to tackle this problem?

Some people think that to lead a successful life, a university degree is important. Others believe that this is no longer true nowadays. Discuss both views and give your opinion.