Your sibling has sent you a letter asking for an update on your life. Write a letter to your sibling. In your letter: – Describe what you did for your last birthday: early mrning visited temple, did dinner at secret kitchenr with my near and dear ones, – Ask for photos of your sibling’s last holiday: toronto visit on your last summer holidays – Talk about something you are looking forward to: about your graduation

Dear Katthy, I hope

this

Linking Words

letter finds you and your family well and in the best spirits. I am writing

this

Linking Words

letter to tell you that I am so glad that you sent me a birthday card with a chocolate cake. I am

also

Linking Words

happy that you asked me about what is going on in my life.

Firstly

Linking Words

, I love to tell you how I celebrated my

last

Linking Words

birthday. In the morning, I simply visited the temple,

then

Linking Words

my friends took me out for a shopping trip, where they bought a cute dress for me. And in the evening, I hosted a small celebration. I know you visited Toronto with a couple of friends during your summer holidays. And took a lot of photos

while

Linking Words

visiting

Correct article usage

the CN

show examples

Tower, and Niagara Falls. Unfortunately, I missed these moments. But what you can do is send me all of your photos. So that I can feel myself over there. I am currently enrolled in an entrepreneurship course, and after graduation, I am planning to get a job in a well-known company, where I can gain deeper insights into the business. I think it will be enough to start my own enterprises. I am looking hearing from you soon! Best wishes, Sam.

kaurjagdeep2097

Aug 10, 2025

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site's author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

task response

To improve task response, make sure you clearly state all parts the prompt asks for and keep to the topic. Add details like who was with you for your last birthday and what you did.

coherence cohesion

To improve coherence and cohesion, write in clear paragraphs, use linking words, and avoid starting sentences with 'And'. Make each paragraph have one main idea.

tone

Warm tone and friendly mood.

conventions

Good ending with a closing.

content

Content covers the asked topics.

Use a variety of complex and simple sentences

You should use complex sentences in your writing, but it does not mean that you should try to make all of our sentences complex.

‘Complex’ sentences are not actually very complex; they are just two or more simple sentences put together. Putting them together makes the essay more coherent and cohesive.

Examples:

I really want to study but I’m too tired.

I wore a warm coat because the weather was cold.

If action is not taken soon on climate change, global warming will get worse.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »- a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Do you want to check your IELTS essays?

Submit unlimited essays, letters and charts. Sign up right now and start improving your writing skills.

6
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
0
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
1
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Single idea per paragraph

Greeting and closing

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 8.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 6.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

Suitable writing tone

Appropriate word count

8 paragraphs

209 words

🚀 Prepare for IELTS writing section today!

Unlimited Task 1 & Task 2 checks
Practice with essays, charts, and letters.
Personalized suggestions & mistake analysis
Spot every mistake and boost your score.
Topic ideas & vocabulary helpers
Expand your ideas and use the right words.
Progress tracking
Watch your writing improve with every practice.

What to do next:

Look at other essays:

7
band
It is important for children to learn what is right and what is wrong at an early age. Punishment is necessary to help them learn the distinction. To what extent do you agree? What sort of punsihment should be given?
Learning what is considered good and bad is crucial for children. I completely agree with this statement because this is the basic for children that have a crucial role when they are adults. It is also crucial to give them educational punishment when they do something wrong.
7
band
The government's investment in arts, music and theatre is a waste of money. Governments should invest these funds in public services instead. To what extent do you agree with the sentence?
The entertainment field plays a vital role in citizens' lives. It gives the person a break from all other busy fields in life. People argue whether the government's investments in art, music, and theatre are a waste of money. Points of view varied regarding this topic. I slightly disagree with this point because there is no way to ignore that side in a modern country. This essay will shed light on the multiple opinions about this topic.
7.5
band
It is responsibility of the developed countries to provide aid to the developing countries. Do you agree or disagree.
In this globalization era, it is debated that the nations which have already developed should give help to the developing economies. Although it is the responsibility of a country to focus on its own growth, some proper guidance from a developed economy definitely helps the fostering countries boost their activities. So, I completely agree with this statement as the aid is important for managing the lack of resources and drawbacks of technological advancement.
7
band
In some countries there are more young people choosing to enrol in work-based training instead of attending university. Do the advantages of this situation outweigh the disadvantages?
Fast-paced life and cut-throat competition in job markets, are encouraging more young blood to take vocational courses than conventional degrees in universities. This essay will discuss both the merits and demerits of this scenario in upcoming paragraphs.
7.5
band
Schools should focus on academic success and passing examinations. Skills such as cookery, dressmaking and woodworking should not be taught at school as it is better to learn these from family. To that extent do you agree or disagree?
There has been quite an obvious discussion around the topic of education. While some people believe that schools should focus only on academic subjects and passing the exam, I would argue that schools should not focus only on academic learning but also teach some practical skills to students. I will explain my reasons in this essay.

Use a variety of complex and simple sentences

It is important for children to learn what is right and what is wrong at an early age. Punishment is necessary to help them learn the distinction. To what extent do you agree? What sort of punsihment should be given?

The government's investment in arts, music and theatre is a waste of money. Governments should invest these funds in public services instead. To what extent do you agree with the sentence?

It is responsibility of the developed countries to provide aid to the developing countries. Do you agree or disagree.

In some countries there are more young people choosing to enrol in work-based training instead of attending university. Do the advantages of this situation outweigh the disadvantages?

Schools should focus on academic success and passing examinations. Skills such as cookery, dressmaking and woodworking should not be taught at school as it is better to learn these from family. To that extent do you agree or disagree?