some people think that studying at university or college is the best route to a successful career ,while others believe that it is better to get a job straight after school. discuss both views.

#people #university #college #route #career #job #school

It is essential to pursue graduation from a well-

recongnisedrecognised

Correct your spelling

recognised recognised

university

or college for a successful career thought by some, whilst other thought that if anyone aims to have a

job

he can get a

job

directly after school. It takes several more years to complete

university

after school,

this

might be the reason to get a

job

straight after basic education. On the one

side

Add a comma

,side

show examples

people opine that completing studies is important for a better future

Remove the comma

apply

show examples

because it opens a wide range of opportunity to grab. After graduation there are many streams to choose from,

firstly

, they can go to pursue post-graduation if they have a high rate of interest in any particular field.

Secondly

, students can start their own business indeed, it is small at start but

this

may turn into gigantic in future.

Thirdly

, graduates can join parents business if any,

this

stream has much more benefits than the others. At

last

, they can always find a

job

in the field they completed their bachelors. On the other side, people believe that completing schooling is enough to get a better

job

Remove the comma

apply

show examples

because

this

provides

them

Correct your spelling

the

show examples

needed

Correct article usage

the needed

show examples

platform

Add an article

a platform

show examples

to start their career. After

Correct your spelling

regular studies

show examples

regular-studies

Add a comma

,regular-studies

show examples

there are only fewer ways to start corporate life.

Initially

, they can either find a

job

and continue to find one until they get one, or they can start their own small firm.

Lastly

, they always have a chance

to begin

university

whenever they feel. In conclusion, both the ways have their separate streams to decide, but the

first

belief of completing

university

or college has more branches fall under it to choose from and has better results as well,

Therefore

, I follow their opinion and always suggest to at least complete graduation.

Submitted by Dhrumil Vaghela on Sat May 22 2021

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Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

for example
for instance
to illustrate this
to give a clear example
such as
namely
to illustrate
take, for example

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10Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
2Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
9Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

288 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 5.0

Complete response

7.5

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Topic Vocabulary:

Academic qualifications
Specialized skills
In-depth knowledge
Personal growth
Social development
Practical experience
Financial independence
Career progression
Professional networking
Education
Work experience
Successful career
Personal interests
Career goals
Decision-making process

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some people think that studying at university or college is the best route to a successful career ,while others believe that it is better to get a job straight after school. discuss both views.

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

Companies should try to make their workers satisfied at work. Do you agree or disagree?

Some universities offer online courses as an alternative to classes delivered on campus. Do you think this is a positive or negative development?

You live on the fourth floor of a five-storey building which is not equipped with an elevator (lift). Write a letter to your neighbors and in your letter • introduce yourself • say what the problem is • ask the neighbors to agree on the installation of an elevator.