IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 6

It is suggested that young adults should undertake a period of unpaid work, helping people in the community. Does it bring more benefits or drawbacks to the young people?

#adults #period #work #people #community
✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
It is proposed that the young
generation
Use synonyms
 should do some charity
work
Use synonyms
 to help
people
Use synonyms
 in
society
Use synonyms
. I opine it will be more beneficial than disadvantageous with following reasons in the succeeding paragraphs. On one hand, young
people
Use synonyms
 doing
such
Linking Words
 unpaid
work
Use synonyms
 has a lot of merits.
First
Linking Words
 and foremost, it will develop the human values in the young
generation
Use synonyms
. By helping
people
Use synonyms
 in the community, young
people
Use synonyms
 will do some good in their
time
Use synonyms
instead
Linking Words
 of wasting
time
Use synonyms
 on social media and spreading negativity.
Moreover
Linking Words
, assisting the problems of others without any expectations will develop a sense of responsibility towards
society
Use synonyms
 in the young
generation
Use synonyms
.
Last
Linking Words
 but not the least, youngsters participating in charity
work
Use synonyms
 will eventually aid the government in their development plans of the country.
On the other hand
Linking Words
, considering the disadvantages, young
people
Use synonyms
 doing unpaid
work
Use synonyms
 will consume their premium
time
Use synonyms
 for nothing which in turn leads to wastage of
time
Use synonyms
. As young
people
Use synonyms
 are the future, doing free of cost
work
Use synonyms
 leads some of them to think they are not worth it, which eventually leading to a depressed state.
Consequently
Linking Words
, the happiness rating of that group of
society
Use synonyms
 decreases. To conclude, the merits of helping community
people
Use synonyms
 without any pay overpowers the demerits of the same. As the
society
Use synonyms
 can benefit from charity
work
Use synonyms
 done by young
people
Use synonyms
 as they are fresh workforce and demerits can be reduced if proper care of young
generation
Use synonyms
 will be taken.
Thus
Linking Words
, the government should bring some schemes in which young
people
Use synonyms
 can volunteer and do some good for
society
Use synonyms
.
Submitted by Kashish Bhatia on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • skill development
  • soft skills
  • teamwork
  • communication
  • leadership
  • social responsibility
  • community engagement
  • empathy
  • civic duty
  • networking opportunities
  • volunteering
  • personal growth
  • confidence
  • financial compensation
  • economic drawbacks
  • exploitation
  • free labor
  • fair exchange
What to do next:
Look at other essays: