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Band 4

It is more important to have a good family than to have friends. Family can always compensate for the absence of friendship. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

#friends #absence #friendship
Indubitably, the family provides support even when
friends
 are not close;
however
, do they play a more significant role in
one
’s life than
friends
? I find it to be true because family provides better advice and a more comfortable environment to be with than
friends
besides
 their unconditional love.
One
 can get better suggestions for his future from his family members.
This
 is because parents in
one
’s family are more experienced than
his
Correct pronoun usage
their
show examples
friends
, who are mostly of the same age.
Consequently
, by following his parents’ advice, there are fewer chances of committing mistakes in life than listening to what a person’s
friends
 say.
For instance
,
one
 of my
friends
 is
successful
Correct article usage
a successful
show examples
businessmen
Fix the agreement mistake
businessman
show examples
 because of his elder
brother
Change noun form
brother's
show examples
 guidance.
Besides
 helping in making the right decisions, the family is easier to adjust
with
Change preposition
to
show examples
. The reason for
it
Correct pronoun usage
this
show examples
 is that
one
is
Wrong verb form
has been
show examples
 with his family representative since childhood, which makes it easier to understand each other’s nature and adjust
accordingly
,
whereas
, in the case of acquaintance,
one
 needs to make extra efforts and change his behaviour to maintain a strong bond. Most importantly, the family loves selflessly. Since the bond between family members is natural, but the same is made after thinking about
one
’s benefits in the case of a companion,
one
 may expect support from the representative of his family even when he cannot return the favour. Had my friend’s father, for instance, thought of the return on investment, he would never have looked after his son’s expenses
while
 allowing him to do
volunteering
Replace the word
volunteer
show examples
 work for two years. In conclusion, owing to the beneficial advice, relaxed environment and unselfish love
one
 gets from his family, I am convinced that the role of the family is bigger than that of
friends
 in every person’s life.
Submitted by gsingla730 on

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Structure your answers in logical paragraphs

The easiest way to score well on the IELTS Task 2 writing portion is to structure your writing in a solid essay format.

A strong argument essay structure can be split up into 4 paragraphs, each containing 4 sentences (except the conclusion paragraph, which only contains 3 sentences).

Stick to this essay structure:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion

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