Caring for children is an important thing of the society it is suggested that all mothers and fathers should be required to take child care training courses to what extent do you agree or disagree?

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It is often said that

parents

Use synonyms

should take

child care

Correct your spelling

childcare

show examples

courses in order to raise their youth in an appropriate way.In

this

Linking Words

essay, I tend to discuss the benefits that society may acquire

Change preposition

through

show examples

this

Linking Words

process and it is my personal belief that if

such

Linking Words

courses

would

Verb problem

were

show examples

readily more available,it would greatly enhance our community.

Firstly

Linking Words

.it is vital that we appreciate the importance of the family as the main source of learning behaviours for youngsters.

In addition

Linking Words

,youth mostly learn the pattern of behaviour by looking at their

parents

Use synonyms

and hearing what they say ,

therefore

Linking Words

,it is so important for

parents

Use synonyms

to learn how they should

act

Use synonyms

in front of their

children

Use synonyms

Moreover

Linking Words

,a study which has been conducted at Harvard University indicates that a youngster's brain is like a sponge and

absorb

Correct subject-verb agreement

absorbs

show examples

things very fast and keeps them for their entire life.

Therefore

Linking Words

,bad-behaved

parents

Use synonyms

can lead youngsters to become criminals or deal with psychological problems.

Consequently

Linking Words

, those kids can undermine society in

Correct article usage

the

show examples

foreseeable future.

However

Linking Words

,some people would argue that

parents

Use synonyms

do not need to learn how to

act

Use synonyms

with their kids and they can learn youngster caring naturally by practising with their

children

Use synonyms

.But,

this

Linking Words

is my belief that not all

parents

Use synonyms

trying

Wrong verb form

try

show examples

act

Use synonyms

well with their kids ,

for instance

Linking Words

, not many years ago in Iran

parents

Use synonyms

used to

Unnecessary verb

apply

show examples

physical

Change the word

physically

show examples

punishment their

children

Use synonyms

due to

Linking Words

a lack of knowledge of how they should

brought-up

Correct your spelling

bring

show examples

youngster

Fix the agreement mistake

youngsters

show examples

and by trying to do what their own

parents

Use synonyms

did to them .

Therefore

Linking Words

children

Use synonyms

can become victims of their

parents

Use synonyms

and experience some mental problems when growing up. In conclusion,it seems to me that it is essential for a family to learn how to

act

Use synonyms

with their

children

Use synonyms

because not only it's going to affect their

children

Use synonyms

's future but

also

Linking Words

secure

Correct subject-verb agreement

secures

show examples

children

Use synonyms

from some wrong

action

Fix the agreement mistake

actions

show examples

such

Linking Words

as physical punishments.

dmaycry303Sat May 29 2021

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coherence cohesion

Introduce clear paragraph breaks to improve readability and logical flow. For example, start new paragraphs for each main point.

coherence cohesion

Work on sentence structure and variety to improve readability and interest. For instance, consider splitting longer sentences into two shorter ones for clarity.

task achievement

Strengthen the thesis statement in the introduction for a more powerful argument. Clearly state your stance on whether you agree or disagree.

task achievement

Include a few more specific examples or studies to support your points. This will make your arguments more compelling and grounded in evidence.

task achievement

Your essay presents a clear stance on the topic and consistently supports it throughout the body paragraphs.

coherence cohesion

The conclusion effectively summarizes your main points and reinforces your argument.

coherence cohesion

Good use of transitional phrases such as 'Firstly,' 'Moreover,' and 'However,' to guide the reader through your arguments.

11
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
3
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
12
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

305 words

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Caring for children is an important thing of the society it is suggested that all mothers and fathers should be required to take child care training courses to what extent do you agree or disagree?

Some people think that success in life comes from hard work and dtermination, while others think that there are more important factors such as money and appearance. Dicuss both views and give your opinion.

Some people think that parents should teach children how to be good members of society. Others, however, believe that school is the place to learn this. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

Some people think that museums should be enjoyable places to entertain people, while others beilieve that the purpose of the museums is to educate. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

It is observed that in many countries not enough students are choosing to study science as a subject. What are the causes? And what will be the effects on society? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from own knowledge or experience.

Some people claim that not enough of the waste from homes is recycled. They say that the only way to increase recycling is for governments to make it a legal requirement. To what extent do you think laws are needed to make people recycle more of their waste?