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Band 5.5

Families who send their children to private schools should not be required to pay taxes that support the state education system. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement?

#families #children #schools #taxes #support #education #system
It is widely believed that
,
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apply
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 those
Correct your spelling
whose
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who's
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whose
show examples
children
 are studying in private
schools
 should not have to pay
taxes
 to provide assistance to
state authorized
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state-authorized
show examples
education
 system. I strongly disagree with
this
 point of view,as
i
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I
show examples
 believe that
Correct your spelling
taxpayers
show examples
tax payers
Correct your spelling
taxpayers
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 are
must
Correct article usage
a must
show examples
 for creating an educational society.
First
 of all,
Correct your spelling
taxpayers
show examples
tax payers
Correct your spelling
taxpayers
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 are an indispensable part of
state
Correct article usage
the state
show examples
 economy because their money helps
to
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apply
show examples
the
government
 for creating
a
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an
show examples
 environment in society in terms of
education
, health care,transportation,and infrastructure.
for instance
, wealthy families tend to send their
children
 to private
schools
 it does not make sense if they do not pay
taxes
, there are innumerable
children
 who are underprivileged so
taxes
 help
government
Add an article
the government
show examples
 to create safe and
education
 environmental, Ultimately
this
 helps to form up
literate
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the literate
a literate
show examples
 nation.
Furthermore
, it is very much needed to pay some sort of money as
tax
 to the authority because it helps
to
Change preposition
apply
show examples
the
government
 to hire more qualified teachers and facilitate
children
those
Correct pronoun usage
apply
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who belong to
middle class
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middle-class
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 families.
For
instance
Add a comma
,instance
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 if a student is
friend
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a friend
show examples
 with a student who is studying in private school
then
 he may brag about facilities which his school provide to him so it, may create
biasness
Correct your spelling
biases
 in between
children
 right from their childhood, so
taxes
 are must for
goverment
Correct your spelling
government
 to build up
schools
 which should be similar to Private
schools
. In conclusion, everyone
have
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has
show examples
 to pay
tax
 as per their income
Correct your spelling
whether
show examples
weather
Correct your spelling
whether
show examples
 you are rich or underprivileged because it helps
government
Correct article usage
the government
show examples
 as a whole, in my
opinion
Add a comma
,opinion
show examples
 it is
must
Correct article usage
a must
show examples
to
Change the verb form
apply
show examples
pay
tax
 to
government
Add an article
the government
show examples
 for
betterment
Add an article
the betterment
show examples
 of
education
 despite your
children
 are studying in
private
Correct article usage
the private
show examples
 sectors.
Submitted by Shaunak Desai on

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To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • tax exemption
  • public education
  • private schools
  • collective responsibility
  • societal welfare
  • equitable access
  • financial burden
  • social cohesion
  • tax credits
  • vouchers
  • subsidies
  • state-funded
  • socioeconomic disparities
  • public vs. private sector
  • quality of education
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