In many societies, elderly people often live in retirement homes. This is not appropriate because families should always care for their aging members. Do you agree?

✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
In many countries, it is commonly the aged generation be taken into aged-care homes. It is believed that family
members
Use synonyms
should invariably treat them,
however
Linking Words
, I strongly against the belief being inappropriate if
elderlies
Use synonyms
live in retirement homes. Because it would be unfair for both children and old ones if they have been attached always together. To commence with, family
members
Use synonyms
have their own life and sometimes they are enforced to work overtime to meet their requirements. So, how do they could always treat their
aging
Change the spelling
ageing
show examples
members
Use synonyms
? Not to mention, a number of
elderlies
Use synonyms
are involving with physical and mental ailments,
for example
Linking Words
, heart attack, Alzheimer, etc. are being prescribed through pills.
As a result
Linking Words
, they certainly need to treat by a nurse. For them, a retirement home would be the best where nursing is appropriate and coming up with other
members
Use synonyms
is joyful. Making friend, chatting and eating around one table help them to feel convenient and satisfied.
However
Linking Words
, meanwhile, some argue that it is unjustified for
elderlies
Use synonyms
to live in
such
Linking Words
places because they are a part of our memory and life and should look up to. Family
members
Use synonyms
, though, cure for them providing phone, they could call as long as homesickness,
for instance
Linking Words
. And
thus
Linking Words
, children can pick them up home for a while, or they may plan to catch them up on weekends gathering and having nice moments. As a consequence, both have their own privacy, at the same time, a sense of satisfaction. In conclusion, I reaffirm my disagreement regarding the notion; since being in retirement homes is not good for
elderlies
Use synonyms
, they should always be remedied by families. I do think the old generation needs nursing, having a connection with others and an aged-care home is suitable, at the same time, there is a family which need to have calmness supplying to
elderlies
Use synonyms
.
Submitted by roosta6787 on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately

Linking words are very important in your essay.

To score effectively on your IELTS exam, you should make an effort to implement short concise sentences coupled with linking words.

Almost every sentence in your essay should have a linking word of some sort.

In fact, the only sentences that can omit linking words are your background sentence and thesis.

Linking word examples:

  • firstly
  • secondly
  • thirdly
  • in additional
  • moreover
  • also
  • for example
  • for instance
  • therefore
  • however
  • although
  • even though
  • despite

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: