IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 4.5

Some People Think that large international sporting events only bring drawbacks and that it is not worth hosting them. Do you agree or disagree?

#people #events
Sports
events
is
Change the verb form
are
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 the
predominent
Correct your spelling
predominant
 part of economic growth. Many masses argue that host international sporting
events
 make the causes
of
Change preposition
apply
show examples
some problems. In my opinion, I
opposite
Replace the word
oppose
show examples
this
 notion and
i
Change the capitalization
I
show examples
 will discuss my views in
upcoming
Correct article usage
the upcoming
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 paragraph. To Commence With, there
are
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is
show examples
multifarious
Add an article
the multifarious
a multifarious
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 reason
of
Change preposition
for
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 positive
develoment
Correct your spelling
development
 through
sports
 event. It helps the growth
ecomimic
Correct your spelling
economic
 condition of
nation
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the nation
a nation
show examples
.
In other words
, when any holistic development
country
orgnize
Correct your spelling
organize
events
 and give the revenue and ads on social media.
Upmteen
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Umpteen
 folk buy
ticket
Add an article
a ticket
show examples
 to watch
event
Add an article
the event
show examples
 because of
this
,
events
 earn big profit and strong their condition.
For example
, one decade ago
london
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London
show examples
 had
conduct
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conducted
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 a vast
sports
 function in
own
Correct pronoun usage
its own
show examples
country
 and around 7 million people went to the event platform where it
was conduct
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was conducted
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 for watching as well as earned
3
Correct article usage
a 3
show examples
million pond surplus.
Thus
,
sports
 games
is
Change the verb form
are
show examples
 the best way to
country
Add an article
the country
show examples
 for
extend
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extending
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 their fund condition.
Furthermore
, Every nation region
want
Change the verb form
wants
show examples
 to physical
activites
Correct your spelling
activities
 games destination.Due to
this
, many masses can get work. To illustrate,
orgnization
Correct your spelling
organization
events
 work require long-time and
enourmous
Correct your spelling
enormous
 individual.
By
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With
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this
poverished
Correct your spelling
impoverished
can
Add a comma
,can
show examples
 wanes for
Correct article usage
the long-term
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long-term
Correct your spelling
long term
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 and
dweller
Correct article usage
the dweller
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 can earn
high
Add an article
a high
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 amount of money. To Examplify, in the whole
world
Add a comma
,world
show examples
 some
country
are
Change the verb form
is
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 not fully developed and have not much currency
for
Change preposition
to
show examples
mitigate
Change the verb form
mitigating
show examples
.
Therfore
Correct your spelling
Therefore
, a lot of people can get work with the help of
orgnization
Correct your spelling
organization
events
. To conclude, it is just not
boost
Correct article usage
a boost
show examples
economy
Add an article
the economy
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 as well as it
motivate
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motivates
show examples
to
Change preposition
apply
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adoloscents
Correct your spelling
adolescents
 towards the games
..
Replace the punctuation
.
...
show examples
Submitted by Komal on

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Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

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