IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 6

Some people think that public health within a country can be improved by government making laws regarding nutritious food. Others, however, think that health is a matter of personal choice and responsibility. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

#people #health #country #government #laws #food #matter #choice #responsibility
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There
are
Change the verb form
is
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 split opinion regarding nutrimental
food
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. It has been argued that
,
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apply
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 regime rules and regulation for nutritious
food
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 within a country would enhance a good and
healtheir
Correct your spelling
healthier
 lifestyle for
human
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a human
the human
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 being. While, other
group
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groups
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 of
people
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 think, it up to individuals to determine how they want to live their lives.
Health
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, in my
prespective
Correct your spelling
perspective
, primarily
a personal obligations
Correct the article-noun agreement
a personal obligation
personal obligations
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also
Linking Words
, the
government
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 has
number
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a number
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 of other
oprions
Correct your spelling
options
 for encouraging citizens to
healtheir
Correct your spelling
healthier
 life.
This
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 essay will substantiate views in the following paragraph with relevant examples. On the one hand , a group of intellectuals assert that
,
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apply
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 administration have to make some laws for the most nutritious foods. It is not a neglectable
the
Correct article usage
apply
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fact that
the
Correct article usage
a
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 healthy diet is good for our body to maintain a healthy metabolic rate along with some other benefits.
For example
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, a few decades ago one law was passed for good
health
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 that prohibits activities that
has
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have
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 detrimental effects on life
such
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 as, drug, alcohol, and smoking are prohibited for certain countries together with few states.
In addition
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 in few countries
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government
Correct article usage
the government
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 levies heavy taxes on fast
food
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 in order to discourage
people
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 from eating it.
Hence
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, these strategies can have positive effects on an individuals
health
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.
On the other hand
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, many
people
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 believe they should be responsible for their
food
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 and drink decisions
,
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apply
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 because personal freedom is their fundamental right.
For instance
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, we are living in a world where we have independence and privilege to do want we want in case if the
government
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 restrict
people
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's choices even though that would be for the betterment of
people
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, that would lead to public concerns
such
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 as protest or marches. A better solution for
this
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 would be to educate
people
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 about a
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balanced
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balance
Correct your spelling
balanced
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 diet which would enable
people
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 to make better
food
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 choices.
This
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 technique would use in
number
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a number
the number
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 of developing countries around the world with a positive result in terms of public
health
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. To conclude, considering above mentioned points it is evident that, balanced diet is the most appropriate way to deal with
this
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 situation. In my opinion,
health
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 decisions should of citizens as everyone has the rights to live their life
accordingly
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;
however
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,
instead
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 of enforcing the rules on the citizens the
government
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 must check the quality of
food
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 and impose the law on manufacturing of these products.
Submitted by ankitacommon on

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Word Count

IELTS says that you should write a minimum of 250 words in writing task 2. If you go under word count you will lose marks in task response.

A very long essay will not give you a higher band score.

Aim for between 260 to 290 words in writing task 2. This will ensure a concise essay and will be realistic in terms of time management. You have only 40 minutes to write the essay and you need around 10 minutes of planning time, so you will not be able to write a long essay in 30 minutes.

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