Some commentators feel that grandparents should live together with their children and grandchildren, while others say that elderly people should be encouraged to live independently. Consider the possible arguments on both sides of this debate, and reach your own conclusion.

#commentators #grandparents #children #grandchildren #people #arguments #debate #conclusion

It is frequently asserted that elderly people ought to live with their extended family, rather than they have to live self-reliant. There are arguments on both sides of

this

very topical debate, which I will discuss now. On the one hand, those who support the idea of

grandparents

spend their time with their children and grandchildren are the best measure point to the fact that it is able to bring happiness at the end of their life.

For instance

ancient

Add an article

the ancient

an ancient

show examples

couple

become

Change the verb form

becomes

show examples

single when their partner dies

this

is why they really need

Remove the article

apply

show examples

promotional support from relations.

Moreover

, it appears to be true that they often have a

healthy

Replace the word

health

show examples

problem at their age.

Therefore

, we ought to live together to take care of

themselves

Correct pronoun usage

ourselves

show examples

easier.

By contrast

, supporters of

grandparents

living independently often state that youngsters have no time available for

grandparents

For example

, it seems to be true that these day youngsters are up to their ears in work as well as study

for

Add the comma(s)

, for this reason,

show examples

this

reason take care of elderly members is out of the question. A

further

argument is that there

are

Change the verb form

show examples

a variety of elderly prefer to live on their own because they are possible to enjoy their life more independent and they do not desire to disturb their others family members. To sum up, it appears to me that the stronger argument is in favour of

grandparents

should live with their children and grandchildren.

This

is provided that we should foster to live self-reliant in an extended house.

Submitted by caomyphuong3004 on Wed Jun 02 2021

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7Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
1Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
7Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

253 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 9.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 5.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 5.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 8.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Some commentators feel that grandparents should live together with their children and grandchildren, while others say that elderly people should be encouraged to live independently. Consider the possible arguments on both sides of this debate, and reach your own conclusion.

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

In some cities of the world, cars are replacing bicycles. However, in some other cities, bicycles are replacing cars. What are the reasons for these two developments? In your opinion, which one better?

Many employees may work at home with modern technology. Some people claim that it benefits only the workers, but not the employers. Do you agree or disagree?

Car ownership has increased so rapidly over the past thirty years that many cities in the world are now one big traffic jam. How true do you think this statement is? What measures can governments take to discourage people from using cars?

Some university students want to learn about other subjects in addition to their main subjects.Others believe it is more important to give all their time and attention to study for a qualification. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion

You are getting married. Write a letter to an English speaking friend to invite him/her to the wedding. In your letter: - Describe who you are going to marry - Tell what will happen on the wedding day (the schedule) - Explain why it's important for him/her to be at the wedding