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Writing Samples
Band 3

Manu students find it difficult to pay attention at school. What are the reasons for it ? What could be done to solve this problem?

#manu #students #attention #school
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Students
 are
backbone
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the backbone
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 of any nation's future. It is often argued that some people face difficulties to be attentive at
school
.
This
 essay will discuss the reasons behind
this
, and potential solutions to overcome
this
 situation. To embark with, There are several reasons why
students
 get fail to pay attention in
Correct your spelling
classroom
classrooms
calssroom
Correct article usage
the calssroom
show examples
.
Firslty
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Firstly
First
,
students
 are so
sensetive
Correct your spelling
sensitive
,
therefore
, whenever they become
witness
Add an article
a witness
the witness
show examples
of
Change preposition
to
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 their
parents
Change to a genitive case
parent's
parents'
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 conflicts, they can not get
this
 out
from
Change preposition
of
show examples
 their head,
conseuqently
Correct your spelling
consequently
,
next
Correct article usage
the next
show examples
 day when they go to
school
 they can not pay attention.
Secondly
,
In
Change preposition
At
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present
Correct article usage
the present
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students
 have become
over obsessed
Add a hyphen
over-obsessed
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to
Change preposition
with
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 the
gamming
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gaming
show examples
 world because of
this
some times
Correct your spelling
sometimes
show examples
 while attending
school
. Apart from
this
, their talks with their friends are
also
 about games. Apart from
this
, their talk with
thier
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their
 friends are
also
 about games, Another cause is some
students
 may feel anxiety about
geeting
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getting
 good academic results while
,
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apply
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 some
students
 feel frightened about their performance at
school
this things
Change the determiner
this thing
these things
show examples
 may discuss them from classroom studies.
On the other hand
, there are some solutions to resolve
this
,problem,
firstly
,
paresent
Correct your spelling
present
parent
 should not fight, Infront of their
Correct your spelling
children
childrens
Correct your spelling
children
show examples
 as it affects their
valuneruble
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vulnerable
 minds.
Secondly
, parents should
limited
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limit
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 their children time for
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playing
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paying
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playing
show examples
 games and spend some more time with them to get
update
Add an article
an update
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 about their day
school
lite
Correct your spelling
life
show examples
. In conclusion,
Although
 it is true that there are some causes which
affects
Change the verb form
affect
show examples
 children's mind while attending
school
 but aforementioned solutions can save
this
 problem to a
grater
Correct your spelling
greater
show examples
 extent.
Submitted by Shaunak Desai on

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Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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