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Band 5.5

Write about the following topic. The internet has greatly increased our access to information. To what extent do you think this is a good thing? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience. You should spend about 40 minutes on this task.

#topic #internet #access #information #minutes
Mobile phones and computers are ubiquitous these days. Residing in one corner of the world we get to know what is happening on the other end . And it is possible through our modern
internet
 technologies. Though the advancement in technology appears to be a boon, we need to watch out for the potholes. I will discuss the merits and demerits of our seemingly increased
access
 to
data
 in the following paragraphs. The
Internet
 has consumed most of us. We are privileged people to have
access
 to everything by a press of a button. Live news, daily weather forecast, political updates are some examples of technological advancement that has impacted us in a positive way. Any or most of these facilities were not available in the olden days. People had to wait a day or two for newspapers to reach their homes. The
Internet
 has
also
 created an impact in the education field. Students are able to see their scores and grades online
instead
 of visiting their college or university. Graduates are able to apply and prepare for their jobs online and can avoid visiting the libraries for reference books. Even though we can argue that increased
access
 to
data
 has mitigated our problems and made our lives easier, it is imperative to know the same has affected lives gravely.Extended connection with information has made personal
data
 easily available to the attackers. Attackers impersonate themselves as a different person to get
access
 to the victim's bank details and use it to steal money,once the details are obtained. It is said that nearly 30% of crimes recorded by
cyber crimes
Correct your spelling
cybercrimes
show examples
 fall under
data
 breach, morphing and misuse of personal
data
.
Also
Add a comma
,Also
show examples
 that bank frauds involved in phishing, password stealing, cyberbullying has
also
 been encountered enormously these days
. .
Replace the punctuation
.
...
show examples
 To conclude, I feel though how much ever it excites us to live in a world of magic, the dark side of the
internet
 is detrimental. It is always better to take precautions, protect our private
data
 and be safe than to complain.
Submitted by ramyamahatma on

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For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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