IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 4.5

Many people think that devices such as computers and cell phones bring more harm than profit. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Nowadays big part of humanity has an opinion that claims brand-new gadgets like
smart phones
Correct your spelling
smartphones
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 and laptops more harmful than useful. I disagree with
this
Linking Words
 statement
,
Remove the comma
apply
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 because devices always make my life easier and I gain only
benefits
Correct article usage
the benefits
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of
Change preposition
from
show examples
its
Correct pronoun usage
their
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 usage. The
first
Linking Words
 reason is that it helps people in all
spehers
Correct your spelling
spheres
sphere
 of their activity. We use them for education,
entertaiment
Correct your spelling
entertainment
, medical care, communication and shopping. If programmists and engineers didn't invent all these tools, we would have to make many things at our own pace and daily activities would consume much more time. But now thanks to technological progress world
popullation
Correct your spelling
population
 can e.g. study at home or call a food delivery services
instead
Linking Words
 of going somewhere, consult a doctor online and interact with each other from every corner of the planet. More than half of today's
learners
Change to a genitive case
learner's
learners'
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 studies via various apps on their devices with comfort and safety. With help of technologies and
Correct article usage
the internet
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internet
Add a comma
,internet
show examples
 everyone has almost unlimited access to
knowledges
Change the wording
knowledge
pieces of knowledge
bits of knowledge
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 and information. The other argument against
this
Linking Words
 statement is that gadgets are a vital component of our
further
Linking Words
 development. It provides
with
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apply
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many resources that let people
to
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apply
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discover some new processes and properties and make new openings.
For example
Linking Words
, using powerful computers with specific applications
sciensts
Correct your spelling
scientists
 can explore space, microscopic particles and even marine life, obtain accurate schemes and charts, program huge productive machines. Many people handle household appliances and means of transport because of computers and machines. To my
mind
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,mind
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 technological devices are the best human invention and they have plenty of advantages that let us turn a blind eye to bad impact. Gadgets bring large profit so that
it
Correct pronoun usage
they
show examples
 became an essential part of our lives and work.

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Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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