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Writing Samples
Band 5.5

There seems to be an increasing number of serious crimes committed each year. While some people think that the best way is to use the death penalty as a deterrent, many other people believe that other measures will be needed.

#crimes #year #people #death #penalty #deterrent #measures
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Every year, it is increasingly popular that the number of
crimes
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 committed. From my perspective, I would argue that there are some benefits of using other punishments for
crimes
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.
Although
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, it is believed by some that the
death
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penalty
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also
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 will deter them. On the one side, there are some plausible explanations as to why the usage of the
death
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penalty
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 will cause a strong impact on other
crimes
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.
To begin
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 with,
this
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penalty
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 will make them scared.
In other words
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, due to the fact that the majority of them frightened of
death
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, it is evident that they won't illegally make anything.
Therefore
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, the quantity of
crimes
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 is increasing more and more.
On the other hand
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, I believe that there are some advantages of using lighter punishments.
Firstly
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, society has more marvellous residents. It means that when they receive these punishments, they can learn varieties of lessons from their faults.
Therefore
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, they can become good citizens until their
penalty
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 ends.
Secondly
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, it is advantageous for the prisons to have more labourers.
In other words
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, the number of
crimes
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 increases dramatically simultaneously with assisting the prisons to have workers who work volunteer activities like digging up, growing plants..... In conclusion, it is understandable why numerous individuals think that there is a deterrent to using the
death
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penalty
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 for
crimes
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. To my mind, it is better for society to reduce
this
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 punishment.
Submitted by letrungthanh2002 on

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To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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