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Band 4

It is often said that governments spend too much money on projects to protect wildlife, while there are other problems that are more important? Do you agree or disagree?

#governments #money #projects #wildlife
The growth of a nation is highly influenced by the richness of
the
Correct article usage
apply
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wildlife
 resources.
Hence
, it is agreed by
people
 that
government
 has to take measures in order to constantly protect them.
However
Add a comma
,However
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 a larger group of
people
 feel
government
Add an article
the government
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 has to be mindful of bigger
problems
 that are affecting lives and divert their focus in resolving those
problems
. I agree with both sides and I think equal attention has to be given to both
the
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situations.
Fisrtly
Correct your spelling
Firstly
First
,it is true that there are
people
 living in slums, small apartments who are struggling to get a good source of drinking
water
. Administrative officers can implement
construction
Add an article
the construction
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 of
water
 reservoirs, dams to save
water
.
Water
 desalination and recycling methodologies can
also
 be brought into action to dwindle
water
 scarcity.
Secondly
, all citizens require transportation facilities in their everyday lives. City counsellors can take steps to regularize traffic by imposing hefty fines for traffic violations, can lay grounds for metro train facilities and can introduce more
air conditioned
Add a hyphen
air-conditioned
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 buses for the crowd to commute to work. Though measures to solve the aforementioned
problems
 would benefit common
people
 , it is
also
 imperative to protect the natural
Replace the word
inhabitants
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habitants
Correct your spelling
habitats
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 from extinction. Recent news stated that there are only seven White tigers in existence and two are in the 'Karakoram
wildlife
sanctuary'
Correct your spelling
sanctuary
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, India. Indian
wildlife
 protection act has taken extreme measures to protect the species and zoologists are working towards breeding more white tigers. Another animal
which
Correct pronoun usage
that
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 is about to go extinct is the
red headed
Add a hyphen
red-headed
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 python, which weighs 27 kilograms and is 10 feet in length. Herpetologists are collaborating with the
government
 to transport the reptile to the
wildlife
 reserve in Australia for reproduction. To conclude, asides
the
Change preposition
from the
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 survival
problems
 humans are facing, I think the circle of life starts and ends with
wildlife
 species and it is the duty of the citizens and the ruling
government
 to keep them away from destruction.
Submitted by ramyamahatma on

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To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • biodiversity
  • ecological balance
  • safeguard
  • natural habitats
  • foster
  • cultural of conservation
  • long-term ecological sustainability
  • economic benefits
  • significant source of revenue
  • investment
  • nation’s economic wealth
  • preservation of ecosystems
  • clean water and air
  • prioritization
  • multi-faceted government budgets
  • environmental protection
  • wildlife conservation
  • neglecting
  • detrimental effects
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