IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 7

Human activity has had a negative impact on plants and animals around the world. Some people think that this cannot be changed, while others believe actions can ben taken to bring about a change. Discuss both and give your opinion.

#activity #impact #plants #animals #world #people #actions #ben #change
✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
Technological advancement has created adverse effects on the biodiversity of our country and has led to the extinction of varied species of plants and
animals
Use synonyms
. Most
people
Use synonyms
 think that we can be devoid of
such
Linking Words
 difficult situations if humans become more responsible,
Linking Words
however
Add a comma
,however
show examples
 a group of
people
Use synonyms
 think it is impossible to curtail minds from being irresponsible. I contend with the fact that change in oneself can bring a change to the world. The following essay will discuss how gravely plant and animal habitations are affected by us and what measures can be taken to protect them. Forests are a natural habitat for a plethora of plants,
animals
Use synonyms
 and birds. Our need to lead a sophisticated life has led to the destruction of forests.
People
Use synonyms
 should be aware that animal attacks,
animals
Use synonyms
 getting into town are the result of wiping off and knocking down their homes. When living beings do not have a secure place for life, they get to the cities in search of food, shelter and become vulnerable when they feel unsafe.
As a result
Linking Words
 , they attack human beings, even kidnap and snatch babies when nobody is around.
For example
Linking Words
, recent news about tigers and leopards roaming in busy streets at night, looking out for food is extremely appalling. I see all
this
Linking Words
 nature's way of punishing
people
Use synonyms
 for scarring their lives.
However
Linking Words
, changes in human's behaviour and some empathy towards the wildlife resources might stop
this
Linking Words
 from happening. The government should impose strict and stringent laws to punish hunters and groups that involve in deforestation.
People
Use synonyms
 should be educated on the importance of plants and their medicinal values and how imperative it is to protect them.
Animals
Use synonyms
 should not be caged, they should be let to survive in their natural environment. The government should
also
Linking Words
 work towards setting up more organizations and involve more volunteers to protect these species. To conclude, I think
people
Use synonyms
 should join hands in protecting the natural resources of our country. Humans are more capable of bringing innovative ideas for the betterment of the nation.
Submitted by ramyamahatma on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

  • for example
  • for instance
  • to illustrate this
  • to give a clear example
  • such as
  • namely
  • to illustrate
  • take, for example

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: