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Writing Samples
Band 8

Many people believe that family has the strongest influence on a child’s development, while others believe that external factors such as television, friends and music play a big role. Discuss both views ?

#people #influence #child’s #development #factors #television #friends #music #role
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The behaviour of a
child
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 is an unpredictable one as it is influenced by a wide variety of
factors
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. Studies conducted by psychologists have shown that external
factors
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 play a greater role compared to their internal counterpart.
Nonetheless
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, whether or not if the statement is true is the question
this
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 essay will answer. On one hand, external elements like television are said to have a heavy influence on children. A survey conducted by Oxford University in 2019 has claimed that children were inspired by their favourite tv-show characters.
In addition
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, the following is the reason why content is age-rated. Inappropriate content can leave a poor impression on the
child
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's judgement. In short, external
factors
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 play a major role in the development of a
child
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.
On the other hand
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, internal
factors
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 like one's family are said to be a heavy influence on a
child
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.
For instance
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, if the parents of a household keep arguing the kid will always be stressed and that may affect his development.
Furthermore
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, the
child
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's experience will prevent him or her from having a proper social life. In summary, internal components can
also
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 leave a lasting impression on the development of young ones. In a nutshell,external
factors
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 especially television play a vital role in the formative years of a kid.
However
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, internal elements tend to greatly influence pre-adolescents as they will spend most of their time at home rather than with external
factors
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such
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 as friends. So it is absolutely necessary to provide a stable environment that can nurture a
child
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's progress.
Submitted by srikanth923 on

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To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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