Some people say that we should not encourage sport games among schools because they lead to competition rather than cooperation. To what extend do you agree or disagree with?

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Nowadays, every school and college are focusing on increased sports and cultural activities.
This
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not only increases the student's focus but
also
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helps them to find their hidden talent.
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Although
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However
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, some people think that
due to
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this
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students are becoming more competitive rather than
being
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apply
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co-operative
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cooperative
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. In my view, it could have both positive and negative
impact
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impacts
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on a child. We will discuss both views in the essay. On the
one
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hand, I think these increased sports activities make the student more competitive as well
teaches
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as teaches
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them how to develop teamwork.
For example
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,
basketball
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in basketball
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,
this
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game
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teaches
players
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to develop skills as well
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as co-ordination
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co-ordination
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coordination
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among the other
players
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to pass the ball and shoot the basket.
Moreover
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,
this
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game
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is not just
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one
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a
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player
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one-player
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game
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, everyone in the
game
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has to contribute to the
game
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in order to win.
In addition
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to
this
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, playing more sports makes them develop sportsmanship, determination, teamwork, cooperation with other teammates etc.
On the other hand
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, I think some people take the
game
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to be competitive and do not learn anything from the
game
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.
For instance
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, if
one
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player is very talented and if he thinks that he just wants to beat other
players
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by himself
then
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he will never be able to learn anything from the
game
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. I had
one
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friend, who was extremely talented in playing basketball
while
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others
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other
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players
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in the team were average. In
one
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game
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he tried to carry the
game
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by himself and did not pass to his teammates. We lost the
game
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because he never took help from his own team. Because, he did not know how to coordinate with his team, he was just competing against other
players
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. In conclusion,
although
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, there are some disadvantages
of
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to
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having more gaming activities it has more advantages. If a student plays more games there are more chances of him/her learning different good traits.
Submitted by anujvyas1392 on

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task response
Expand the introduction to provide a clear opinion to the given prompt and address both parts of the question (agree and disagree). Ensure that each paragraph focuses on a specific point and follows a clear structure (introduction, body, conclusion).
coherence and cohesion
Ensure that there is a more consistent use of cohesive devices such as transition words and linking phrases to improve the overall coherence and cohesion. Use a wider range of cohesive devices to connect ideas more effectively throughout the essay.
lexical resource
Use a wider range of vocabulary to express ideas more precisely and avoid repetition. Additionally, pay attention to word choice and accuracy to convey meaning effectively.
grammatical range
Review the use of complex sentence structures and a variety of grammatical constructions. Aim to demonstrate more accuracy and range in sentence structures, including the use of different verb tenses and sentence types.
Topic Vocabulary:
  • fostering
  • determination
  • teamwork
  • rivalry
  • discipline
  • responsibility
  • sportsmanship
  • social interaction
  • platform
  • unity
  • physical activity
  • school pride
  • cognitive abilities
  • healthy lifestyles
  • stress relief
  • fair play
  • talents
  • valuable life lessons
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