People nowadays are not as fit and active as they were in the past. What are the reasons for this? What measures can be taken for this?

In the

last

decades,

people

have gradually become more sedentary, at the same time, obesity affects an important percentage of the population. In the following short essay, the reasons for

this

and some possible solutions will be addressed.

To begin

, sedentarism and overweight issues are narrowly connected. In the

last

half of the 20th

century

Add a comma

,century

show examples

the global economy switched from hard labour to services and information

techologies

Correct your spelling

technologies

. Having said that, nowadays, more and more

people

work behind a desk without having to do any kind of physical activity.

Moreover

, the fast-

food

industry has increased dramatically and has changed the eating patterns

especially

Add the comma(s)

,especially

show examples

in the western world.

For example

, one century ago, an average worker stayed for more than eight hours a day

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show examples

a farm and used to eat fresh

food

in contrast

, currently, the same person gests sitted eight hours in an office and

has

Change the verb form

have

show examples

breakfast and

luch

Correct your spelling

lunch

in a restaurant full of ultra-processed

food

. Since obesity has turned into a public health problem, one feasible solution might come from local

goverments

Correct your spelling

governments

government

, they should increase

campaings

Correct your spelling

campaigns

campaign

of awareness against the low-activity way of life and all its risks. Politicians can take direct actions against the

availabilty

Correct your spelling

availability

of fast

food

by increasing the taxes to those companies. Maybe, if more data related to the negative consequences of poor eating

choises

Correct your spelling

choices

mixed with low activity habits were exposed in public media,

people

would be more careful of their daily life.

For instance

, parents will

double check

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double-check

show examples

Remove the article

apply

show examples

soda is a suitable

bevarage

Correct your spelling

beverage

for their children if they knew that sugar is highly related to

diabethes

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diabetes

and

kindney

Correct your spelling

kidney

issues. To conclude, the main reason for

people

being less fit and active than older generations

Remove the comma

apply

show examples

may be

Correct your spelling

maybe

show examples

the dangerous combination of low-quality

food

and sedentarism. In order to mitigate

this

issue,

goverments

Correct your spelling

governments

government

can publish campaigns to reduce the

comsumption

Correct your spelling

consumption

of bad

food

and improve the habits of their population.

Submitted by camiloko1989 on Mon Jun 21 2021

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Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

Paragraph 1 - Introduction

Sentence 1 - Background statement
Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
Sentence 3 - Thesis
Sentence 4 - Outline sentence

Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 4 - Conclusion

Sentence 1 - Summary
Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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7Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
2Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
19Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

317 words

5.50

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.5

Complete response

6.5

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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People nowadays are not as fit and active as they were in the past. What are the reasons for this? What measures can be taken for this?

Fully explain your ideas

Some people think that illegal Internet downloads are having a negative effect on the music industry. Others feel that they have little or no impact on artists. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

Some countries have legal ages at which people can drink. Other countries believe not have strict laws is a better policy. Discuss both sides and give your own opinion

Some people think that older school children should learn a wide range of subjects to acquire more knowledge, while other people believe they should learn a small number of subjects in details. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

People today increasingly use credit cards to make monthly purchases. Do the advantages outweigh the disadvantages?

Some people say that the best way to improve public health is by increasing the number of sports facilities. Other, however, say that this would have little effect on public health and measures are required.