many people believe that mobile phone cause more harms than benefits. to what extend do you agree or disagree?

#people #phone

Some individuals say that handheld devices are detrimental rather than beneficial. In my opinion, the mobile

phone

is harmful to our health,

although

I concede its advantage for the purpose of entertainment. On the one hand, technology devices

such

as mobile

phone

are advantageous in terms of entertainment due to their convenience. A mobile

phone

is just as small as a purse, which means

people

can reach into their pocket for their phones.

Therefore

, folk can,

for instance

, watch music videos, TV shows or play games on their own

phone

whenever they want

instead

of using bigger and non-portable technological gadget

such

as a TV or a computer.

This

will help students and workers unwind and alleviate stress after a hard-working day.

On the other hand

, the mobile

phone

has damaging effects on our society due to

people

's overdependence on phones. In the past, when the

phone

was not so prevalent, inhabitants often talk together about personal and political topics while commuting to their workplaces and educational institutions by train or bus.

This

enhanced their mental well-being and established a friendly relationship between

people

However

phone

gains its popularity these days, which means

people

just keep looking at their own phones

instead

of having a little chit-chat with other commuters.

This

does not degrade only the quality of

people

's lives but it

also

makes the society more fragmented and insular. In conclusion, despite the merit of the

phone

in terms of entertainment, I believe that it is more harmful due to the effect on society. If individuals realised the damaging drawback of mobile

phone

and altered its attitude towards other,

this

trend would be curbed.

Submitted by yurodoan3 on Sat Jun 26 2021

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9Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
2Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
0Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

275 words

7.00

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 6.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 9.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

7.5

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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many people believe that mobile phone cause more harms than benefits. to what extend do you agree or disagree?

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Some parents want their children to read only serious educational books at all times. They don’t want their children to read any entertaiment books because they think it is wast of time. Do you agree or disagree?

Some commentators feel that grandparents should live together with their children and grandchildren, while others say that elderly people should be encouraged to live independently. Consider the possible arguments on both sides of this debate, and reach your own conclusion.

young people are often influanced in their behaviours and situations by others of the same age. This is called "peer pressure". Do the Disadvantages outweigh the advantages?

Many people believe that international tourism is a bad thing for their country. Why do they think so? What can be done to change their views?

The media should stop reporting details of crimes to the public because it only has negative influences on them. To what extent do you agree or disagree ?