IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 7

Some young people are leaving the country side to lives in cities and towns,leaving only old people in the country side. What problems are caused by this issue. What can be done to solve this issue

#people #country #side #lives #cities #towns
There is no shadow of a doubt that youngsters are switching from regional
areas
 to metropolitans for work. A predominant factor is a luxurious lifestyle and a better employment opportunity. There are a plethora of drawbacks to
this
 trend. To tackle
this
 government should take a proper measure to ameliorate
this
 issue. A paramount reason is an advanced infrastructure in
cities
.
This
 is because big firms are established in a large metropolis which provides attractive offer
such
 as high salaries, and incentives that are hard to obtain in the outskirts.
Therefore
,
people
 change their
cities
 according to their choice. To illustrates, The Times of India reported in a recent survey over 70% of labour came from rural
areas
such
 as Bihar, Uttarakhand, and Rajasthan. These
people
 work in
cities
 so that they can provide basic facilities to their families.
However
,
this
 trend many causes obstacle in
cities
.
In other words
, burgeoned population in urban
cities
 may rise in traffic congestion and pollution. On the other side, the undeveloped
areas
 will remain as it is because talented individuals leave their home.
Hence
, there will be fewer chances of improvement in
this
 area. To solve
this
 problem, the high authorities should plan steps so that they can divert the interest of young
people
.
For example
, the Australian government encouraging young
people
tomove
Correct your spelling
to move
 to regional
areas
, and they will provide them with early settlement option
such
 as a heavily discount on real estate, and the establishment of large companies. In conclusion,
although
 young
people
 travelling to urban
cities
 from the underdeveloped area for their career, I believe if regime along the young
people
 work on building rural
areas
,
then
people
 can spend their life in their
cities
.
Submitted by daisysharma0087 on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: